It was a quiet morning. Too quiet.
The kind of quiet that only happens before a parrot does something spectacularly idiotic.
Percy was perched on the sugar jar, sipping the foam off a forgotten latte, when he spotted it: a fortune cookie, lying mysteriously on the windowsill.
Unwrapped. Glowing faintly. Whispering… maybe.
He narrowed his eyes. "Dessert… or destiny?"
Without hesitation, he swallowed it whole.
Stage One: Enlightenment
Ten minutes later, Percy blinked, twitched, and then squawked:
"THE FROG SHALL RISE AT MIDNIGHT!"
Sabel, Rosemary, and Malaki all froze mid-coffee-pour.
"…What?"
"THE ONE WITH TOO MANY SHOES SHALL SLIP ON MILK!"
"Okay he's broken again," Rosemary muttered.
But just then, Malaki slipped on spilled milk and fell flat on his back, knocking over a display of boots someone had mysteriously donated earlier that morning.
"…That's oddly specific," Sabel muttered, intrigued.
Stage Two: The Cult of Percy
By afternoon, Percy had become a full-blown oracle.
Locals were lining up at the café just to hear their fates.
"I see… a cat… and an overdue library book," he croaked to a nervous customer. They gasped. "My cat's name is Booky!"
"I've seen stranger things," Rosemary said flatly as Percy chanted, "THE BANANA IS A LIE."
Malaki sold 'Percy Predicts' lattes at twice the price.
Sabel tried to analyze the magic but only got glitter in his hair.
Percy, meanwhile, wore a tiny wizard hat and strutted like royalty.
Stage Three: Trouble Brews
But with great wisdom comes great… weirdness.
The parrot's predictions grew more chaotic.
"DO NOT TRUST THE BROCCOLI."
"THE SUGAR DRAGONS SHALL RETURN ON A WEDNESDAY."
"YOUR TOES HOLD SECRETS."
Customers began panicking.
One woman refused to eat vegetables. A man shaved his toes for reasons best left unexplored.
Rosemary slammed the ledger closed. "Okay, bird's going on break."
But just then, Percy stood up on the counter, wings wide, eyes glowing.
"THE BEANS OF TRUTH SHALL REVEAL THE COFFEE WITHIN!"
The espresso machine exploded in a puff of prophecy.
Stage Four: Revelation
Sabel finally found the cookie's magic residue: a charm of chaos and clairvoyance. Probably slipped into the café by a rogue magical baker.
He confronted Percy.
"Your brain's running on prophecy and caffeine. That's dangerous."
Percy blinked. "I see… a bucket of cold water in my future."
"…You're learning."
And with one bucket splash and a loud "SQUAWK," the curse broke.
The Aftermath
The line vanished. Peace returned.
Percy went back to stealing sips and napping in scone trays.
Malaki missed the tips. Rosemary swore never to serve enchanted baked goods again. Sabel labeled the broken cookie jar "DO NOT TOUCH (OR EAT)."
Later, the prince stood on the rooftop, sipping a simple mocha.
"Who knew a bird could cause a prophecy panic?"
Percy landed beside him, still wearing his little wizard hat.
"Want me to tell your future, Your Highness?"
"No thanks. I like surprises."
"Too bad," Percy grinned. "You're stepping in banana tomorrow."