This morning was particularly difficult for Shirou.
First, during his sleep, he once again dreamed of the massive fire from ten years ago. This time, however, the sea of flames included a younger version of himself and the red-clad Servant who had given him his arm.
If that was all, it wouldn't have been so bad. After all, it's pretty normal for protagonists to have some kind of guardian spirit. In other productions—whether it's piloting Gundams or card dueling—not having a guardian spirit might even disqualify someone from being the lead.
What truly left Shirou feeling lost was the soul-searching question posed by his younger self in the dream.
"You betrayed it," the young Shirou said.
"Your vow."
Indeed, Shirou Emiya had once vowed to become a hero of justice, just like his father, Kiritsugu Emiya.
This vow was the starting point of "Shirou Emiya," the reason for his existence in the world. To be able to hold his head high before those who couldn't be saved, Shirou had pushed himself to the brink repeatedly. This determination had carried him to where he stood today.
And yet—
"Why? Why did you betray your past self?"
This was a soul-piercing question from Shirou to himself.
He already knew who was responsible—the black sun in the forest, the creature that devoured Servants. Shirou's mission was to eliminate it before it could repeat the tragedy of ten years ago.
That was why Shirou Emiya existed: to save those crying for help and to protect the innocent by sacrificing himself if necessary.
But that was the Shirou of not long ago.
Now, Shirou had given his heart and ideals to a single girl, Matou Sakura, and in doing so, he had denied his former self.
"If this continues..."
In the dream, the young Shirou grinned sinisterly.
"Shirou Emiya, you'll be judged by your own hands—"
"Ah!"
With a shout, Shirou woke up from the nightmare.
At first, he thought it was simply a bad dream—a manifestation of guilt over dedicating everything to Sakura.
But what happened next that day proved to Shirou the true meaning of "things can always get worse."
For this part of the story, Shinji once again abandoned the rushed pacing of the movie adaptation, opting for the original sequence from the game.
The reason was simple: the order of these events gradually deepened Shirou's despair, step by step breaking his beliefs and plunging him into confusion.
With ample runtime in the latter half of Episode 4, Shinji had plenty of time to "ruin"—ahem, develop—the character in a more vivid and dynamic manner.
After waking from his nightmare, the first thing Shirou learned from Rin was this: Sakura's condition had worsened and she was on the verge of collapse.
Unaware of the previous night's tragedy in the alley, Shirou believed it was merely the Crest Worms acting up. He entrusted Sakura to Rin, hoping she could alleviate her pain.
As Shirou lacked any significant magical expertise, he stayed in the living room to avoid hindering Rin's treatment.
Then came the second shock of the day.
Nearly every TV channel was broadcasting the same news: a large-scale, unexplained disappearance of people.
Over 40 buildings with unaccounted-for residents. A total of nearly 60 individuals, none of whom were seen again.
"How could this happen..."
Staring at the list of over 60 missing people on the screen, Shirou's face turned pale.
The guilt overwhelmed him—he couldn't accept the enormity of such a crime. Nor could he accept that he had abandoned the mission to stop it for Sakura's sake.
To describe Shirou's state of mind in terms of a certain rap battle, he felt guilty to the world, ashamed before Kiritsugu, and resentful toward the Counter Force. He even wanted to impeach himself!
Shirou's emotions were in turmoil. His internal scales wavered between his ideals and his feelings for Sakura, leaving him lost and confused.
At that moment, Rin entered the room.
She turned off the television and scolded Shirou harshly for his habit of shouldering everything himself, calling him an outright fool.
After a callback to the classic scene of "Shirou Emiya high-jumping," Rin updated him on Sakura's condition.
Sakura, who had already died once, was on the brink of collapse. If her condition worsened further, there would only be one outcome: Rin would have to kill her own sister.
"Sorry, Emiya-kun. I'm not like you. I can't protect Sakura until the very end, nor do I intend to," Rin said solemnly.
"Rin..."
"If something is beyond my ability, I won't even attempt it," she continued.
Though Rin was a morally grounded individual, unlike the idealistic Shirou, her decisions had always been rooted in practicality.
"We agreed on this from the start. As long as I'm still Rin Tohsaka, if I judge that things have reached their limit, I'll kill Sakura."
With that cold and heartless remark, Rin left the room, leaving Shirou sitting there in a daze.
He had abandoned his ideal of becoming a hero of justice, all for the sake of protecting the girl named Sakura Matou.
And yet, the girl he wanted to protect above all else was now slipping away from him.
Shirou felt like a fool. He had been willing to sacrifice everything for Sakura, yet even she seemed beyond his grasp.
Meanwhile, the audience's mood was far more relaxed than Shirou's.
Fujita even had the leisure to joke, "Looks like Sakura's body has hit its limit. Shibamatsu, time to head to the basement."
"Says who?!"
Though fully aware he was just being stubborn, Shibamatsu clung to his argument. "Didn't you see how Sakura's body instantly healed before? For all you know, a miracle could still happen!"
"Umu. (Just give up and join me in the basement.)"
Having used her True Future Sight: Insider Information, Aoko rolled her eyes. She was convinced that Shibamatsu's resistance was utterly futile.
After all, having someone to share your suffering with makes it far more tolerable than enduring it alone.
◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇◆
On-screen, neither Shirou nor the audience realized that the most shocking revelation of the day was still to come.
While Shirou was lost in thought, an uninvited guest arrived at the Emiya household.
"Emiya Shirou, correct?"
The voice belonged to Assassin Hassan-i-Sabbah, who appeared before Shirou.
"The magus wishes to meet with you, Emiya Shirou."
Wearing a white skull mask, the stoic (and expressionless) assassin delivered a message from Zouken Matou.
At first, Shirou thought this was a golden opportunity to defeat Zouken and liberate Sakura.
However, when he finally confronted Zouken, he was faced with a shocking truth.
The Holy Grail—or rather, the "shadow" fused with its fragments—was none other than Sakura's own shadow.
The enemy Shirou had been determined to destroy was the very girl he had sworn to protect.
But that wasn't all. Zouken presented Shirou with an impossible choice: a method to save Sakura.
"Killing this old man is pointless. The only way to end the Holy Grail War is to activate the Grail. But if the Grail itself is activated, Sakura's soul will scatter without resistance."
Zouken chuckled perversely, clearly relishing Shirou's torment as he pondered his decision.
"If you want to save her, you'll have to endure until the end of the Holy Grail War. It's not far off—just four days remain."
"Four days. As long as I make it through these four days, Sakura will be saved?"
Hearing this, Shirou felt a brief surge of joy. At last, there was a way to save the girl he cherished.
However—
"Do you think Sakura can last for four days?"
"She definitely can!"
"But can everyone else wait that long?" Zouken said with malicious intent. "How many humans disappeared last night? How many will vanish tonight? Have you considered that?"
"If this continues, won't the people of this city be completely devoured in a matter of days?"
Zouken's questions were like daggers to Shirou's ears.
"Then... what should I do?"
"It's simple. You just have to kill Sakura. Otherwise, she will continue to prey on humans tonight."
"What I wanted to tell you is this: Shirou Emiya, the greatest calamity is the one you're protecting."
As if he hadn't inflicted enough pain, Zouken delivered a final blow.
"To rid the world of evil for the sake of millions—Shirou Emiya, if you truly inherited Kiritsugu's will, then Matou Sakura is your enemy."
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"So that's it!"
Alice immediately understood. "This is Zouken's goal. He wants Shirou to abandon Sakura, driving her to complete despair so she becomes the Holy Grail!"
"Could Shirou actually go through with it?"
Fujita voiced his doubts about Alice's speculation.
"That's probably what's going on!" Shibamatsu nodded furiously.
"If that's the case, the next plotline will be Shirou trying to stop Sakura from losing control! They'll team up to fight Zouken, and the story will end with them surviving."
"After all, if Sakura and Illya can share the Servants, their chances of survival should be pretty high."
Shibamatsu's confidence soared. He began to think of himself as a prophet, far removed from the proverbial "basement."
"But this doesn't align with HF's darker tone," Alice quietly remarked.
From its horror-film-like first episode to its grim and tragic developments, HF had consistently leaned into its R-rated elements to tell a story about the destructive nature of magecraft.
Magi who pursued the Root and became consumed by their desires ultimately turned into monsters.
"That seems to be the core theme of this HF arc," Alice reflected, tapping her chin. "To showcase the ultimate dangers of magecraft, Sakura's breakdown feels inevitable. It's just a question of how Zouken will wrap things up—with two episodes left."
Although Alice had been captivated by the compelling storytelling in Shinji's adaptation, she couldn't deny that her initial interest stemmed from the film's unique perspective on magecraft.
As a series created by a magus, HF had moved away from showcasing intricate magical techniques. Yet, Shinji Matou's philosophical take on magecraft still resonated deeply with her.
"To understand a magi, you must first understand their attitude toward magecraft."
Through HF, Shinji's interpretation of magecraft had become increasingly clear to Alice, offering a fascinating glimpse into his worldview.
<+>
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