Today, we open up not to a camera coming on and revealing the handsome stud that is Chris Mclain. No. Today we once again find ourselves…in Royal Woods Michigan. But not the Loud House. Today we find ourselves in a house that is much more neat and tidy than the Loud House. Heck, there was hardly a spec of dirt anywhere and the whole house had a fancy feel to it. But despite the fancier esthetic of this household, it was still home to someone who meant quite a lot to Lincoln.
"Ok drinks, check, chips, check, tarp over the couch to protect it from chip crumbs, check." Listing off various things on a fancy glass table ranging from pops to snacks was a 16-year old boy. He was African American and had black hair done up in an afro and wore thick glasses with black rims. He wore a blue sweater with a yellow undershirt and black jeans. This was the best friend to Lincoln Loud, Clyde Mcribe. "Alright! Looks like we're all set."
"Man, I still can't believe what happened last episode with that Izzy girl." A female voice spoke up as someone else came in from what was presumably the kitchen. She was a very tall girl with long black hair and tanned skin. She wore a red headband, a white jacket with red highlights, a black sleeved shirt under a bright blue tank top with a white star in the middle, a black skirt, white socks with a red and blue stripe on each, and white boots with green highlights. This was Stella. "I mean getting hunted down by the RCMP. If she was a wanted criminal why would they let her on the show? Duncan is one thing but this is the freakin RCMP we're talking about."
"Because it makes for awesome tv that's why." Stella rolled her eyes at the voice that spoke up. Walking past Stella was another 16-year-old boy with bright orange hair and freckles covering his face. He wore a green short sleeved shirt over a yellow long sleeved one and baggy jeans as well as a red beanie on top of his head. "Along with the rest of those lovely ladies~"
"Rusty that's terrible." Stella scolded the ginger as well as revealing his name to everyone. "Besides, it's obvious most of those girls are either taken, interested in someone else, wouldn't be interested in you, or you should stay clear from."
"Well that's certainly not stopping Lincoln." Rusty pointed out with a bit of a jealous look on his face. He and his friends have been watching Lincoln compete on Total Drama Island since episode one and it was clear since the very first episode, in his eyes at least, that Lincoln was making a move on the mysterious nature lover Dawn. "Going straight from Santiago to Dawn."
"Well ah gotta say I'm happy for ole Linc." A southern voice suddenly spoke up and getting all attention on him. Carrying a few bags of pork rinds was a boy with orange hair but not nearly as many freckles as Rusty. He had buck teeth and wore blue overalls with a dark green shirt underneath along with black and red boots. This was Liam. "It's a good thing the guy moved on after Ronnie Anne broke his heart. Still can't believe that gal did that to him."
"I know right." Stella said as she moved to the tarp covered couch with her hands on her hips. "That's such a shame. And after they've been together for like three years. I didn't think Ronnie Anne could get that petty."
"Although you can't lie, I'm sure it stung for Ronnie Anne when Lincoln went to go be on Reality TV without her." The final voice in the house spoke up. This boy had red unkept hair and, like Liam, had buck teeth. He wore a white t-shirt along with a blue and dark green checkered pattern jacket along with blue jeans with a brown belt and white sneakers. This was Zach Bridle. "Can't blame her for being upset."
"Yeah I guess so." Clyde admitted as he organized all the snacks and drinks on the table. His family did stand for neatness and tidiness after all. "Still, she could have handled it more rationally. But I'm glad Lincoln is moving on…although I still do find Dawn kinda creepy…"
Everyone from Lincoln's friend group back home shivered in agreement. They remember many of Dawn's mysterious abilities. From talking to animals, to guessing everything about a person there is to know, heck, they swear in one scene that Dawn moved without moving her legs. "It's like if Lucy was a tree hugger…" Rusty stated as he couldn't help but compare Dawn to Lincoln's little goth sister.
"Well…if she makes Lincoln happy." Stella pointed out with the friend group nodding in unison. So long as Lincoln liked her, quirks and all, that was good enough for them. Just so long as she treated him right. But considering what they've seen from her the girl probably didn't have a bad bone in her body. Now Heather, they all agreed that girl was rotten to the core. "Plus, she and Lincoln are really cute taking care of that platypus together!"
"That feller did look mighty happy with the two of em didn't he?" Liam let out a hearty chuckle as he and the others positioned themselves onto Clyde's couch. Just so long as they cleaned up afterward, Clyde's dads had absolutely no issue with all of them gathering up at the Mcbride house to watch some Total Drama and cheer Lincoln on. "Though can't say ah approve of that Mclain bringing in critters from other places to the island."
"Oh it's fine." Rusty explained as he got comfy and grabbed a can of soda. "Besides you saw the last episode with those monster beavers and geese. If those things can live their anything can live their."
"Man, to think those things have survived since the dinosaurs…" Zach said with an amazed expression on his face. While he was mostly a huge alien's fan, to the point of both him and his parents being completely paranoid of a possible invasion, dinosaurs and other prehistoric stuff was awesome as well! "Although I think it's safe to say Beth's completely screwed her team."
"Yeeeeeeah…" Stella slowly let out as she and the rest of the friend group remember seeing Beth take that tiki statue off the island with her. As well as remembering Chris' warning of taking something off the island will leave you cursed. If only Beth had gone to the bathroom a little earlier so she could hear the warning. "While I was a little skeptic at first I think Dawn's words pretty much confirmed it."
"Well, only one way to find out." Clyde said as he grabbed the remote and aimed it at the tv. "Episode's about to start. So let's see what happens!" Everyone eagerly agreed with Clyde as all of them turned and gave their full attention to the TV and Clyde turned it on. And they quickly started watching the newest episode of Total Drama Island…
"Last time on Total Drama Island…" Chris flashed his perfect white teeth at the camera as he begun the recap. "Both teams set out on a canoe trip to deadly Boney Island. Cody hit on Gwen about eighty times, but he made up for it by setting her up with the guy she actually wanted to hang with, Trent. Good strategy, bro! There were winners. And there were losers. Also known as, The Gophers. The last marshmallow was set to go to either Izzy or Lindsay, but the RCMP swooped in and bam! Izzy hightailed it outta there! Hahahah, man, I knew the girl was nuts, but I didn't know she was totally insane! However, one Gopher may have secretly done something even crazier when she brought home a creepy stick statue voodoo thingy from the deadly haunted island. Will Beth live to regret her souvenir? And can my teeth possibly get any whiter? Find out here on Total. Drama. Island!"
"See!" Stella yelled out. "Even he agrees with me about Izzy!"
"And of course he knows about Beth's stunt." Rusty commented after taking a drink of his pop. "Doubt he's gonna tell them though. Although a cursed camper and/or team would make for some pretty fun television…"
"Brbrb! Brbrb! Brbrb! Brbrb!" Currently the sounds of a platypus could be heard from the front of the Killer Bass cabin. Currently, Lincoln, Dawn, and Edward could be seen together on the steps of the Killer Bass cabin with Dawn currently scratching Edward's belly with the platypus enjoying every bit of it.
"Who's a little spoiled boy." Dawn said to Edward in a cute puppy dog voice. "You are! Yes you are!"
"Brbrbrbr!" Edward let out in pure bliss.
"Hahaha, guess you must really give good belly rubs." Lincoln complimented the aura reader as she did just that to Edward. "Man he's really enjoying it."
"Oh yes." Dawn nodded as she started scratching under Edward's beak. "He just loves attention."
"Aaaaaawww." Everyone watching on the couch let out as they watched Lincoln and Dawn spoil Edward.
"Now that is one happy critter." Liam commented as he nodded in approval. "You done good Linc, you done good."
"They kinda look like a little happy family." Stella gushed as she couldn't help but picture Lincoln and Dawn as a dad and mom with Edward as their little child.
Lincoln smiled and was about to speak up again, but suddenly the sound of a helicopter startled all three of them and made Edward roll to his feet and for Dawn and Lincoln to stand up. "Oh! Hit the deck! They're coming, man! They found us!" They all heard Duncan yell from inside of the cabin as Lincoln and Dawn looked up to see a helicopter flying above the camp. And due to Dawn's aura sensing, she knew it was Chris inside flying around.
From inside the Gopher cabin, Leshawna's head shot up from her bed and hit the top bunk. "OW!" Leshawna grunted as she rubbed her head. "Okay, that dude is really starting to get on my last nerve!"
"Whatever." Heather yawned as she started to get up from bed. "He just loves ruining our mornings. Beth, Lindsay, go warm up the shower for me." Beth and Lindsay, still feeling sleepy, looked at each other in silence only for Heather to order. "Now!" They both flinched at this and stood up from bed. "And remember…"
Beth groaned tiredly with a bit of irritation in her voice. "Not too hot this time I know."
"Why are they still doing stuff for her?" Zach questioned while giving Heather an angry look. They haven't even met Heather in real life, but after seeing all the things she's done like convincing her team to vote off Tyler, reading Gwen's diary, and just her overall attitude made her easily hated by Lincoln's friend group. "Lindsay I guess is too dumb to know better but Beth's gotta be smarter than that."
"Maybe she's scared of separating from Heather." Clyde chipped his theory in. "You can't lie she is intimidating. Beth's probably afraid of what Heather would do to her if she tried to stand up or separate from her."
"Holy shamoly, I don't know what's worse right now." Stella commented while feeling great amounts of pity for Beth. "The potential curse or being Heather's lacky."
Later at the washrooms, all the girls from both teams with the exception of Dawn and Heather were all trying to hold in their pee as they all waited in line for the bathroom. "What's the hold up?!" Bridgette yelled from the middle of the line.
"Heather needs her private time." Lindsay said with a strained voice.
"How long's queenie gonna be in there?" Leshawna glared at the washroom door, wishing she could tear Heather a new one for making her and all the other girls wait. "I got urgent business!"
"She could still be a while." Beth told her teammate.
"Ugh! That's it." Gwen then ditched the line and started heading towards the woods. "I'm going lumberjack style."
"Desperate times call for desperate measures I guess…" Stella cringed a bit.
The other girls cringed a bit as feedback from the loud speaker got all of their attention. "I hope you're ready for the most challenging challenge yet." Chris announced to everyone. "Breakfast in three minutes at the campfire pit."
After hearing this, the rest of the girls sans Lindsay and Beth decided to follow Gwen's lead and go do their business in woods. Beth knocked on the washroom door to get Heather's attention and inform her of the time limit only for the leader of their alliance to say. "Can one of you come in here and lotion my back? It's peeling!" Both Lindsay and Beth cringed at this with the former slowly backing away into the woods. When Beth looked to where Lindsay was to see if she could get the blond's help with this, Beth saw no one and was forced to tread the most likely disgusting grounds on her own.
No one could say a thing as they were too busy both gagging and feeling incredibly bad for Beth. She's just having to suffer more and more already. Looks like that curse might be real.
A little over three minutes afterward, both teams were seen gathered up where Chris told them to be with the host of the show standing in front of all of the contestants. "Are you ready for today's extreme max impact challenge?!" Chris yelled to everyone, really hyping up the challenge for today.
"We are ready!" Owen cheered while raising his arms.
"Incoming!" Chris yelled as he held up a box filled with cans and proceeded to throw one towards Gwen. Gwen flinched, thinking it was about to hit her in the face, but luckily Trent came to the rescue and caught the can before it could hit her. Chris then began throwing the cans of what the campers learned were beans to all of the contestants. "This, is breakfast."
"No." Heather said with disgust as she looked at the can. "Breakfast is crepes, croissants, even Chef's crappy burnt eggs."
"Beans, beans, they're good for your heart, the more ya eat, the more ya-" Owen happily sung before Heather threw her can at the big guys face.
"Today's challenge is about survival." Chris explained before pulling out something from behind his back. A paintball gun. "We're going hunting."
"What?!" Dawn gasped in horror.
"Now that's more like it." Duncan said with an eager smirk.
"Isn't that a paintball gun?" Harold asked as he pointed to the green gun in Chris's hands.
"Why yes Harold." Chris said as he aimed the paintball gun at Harold and shot the ginger with it. "It is."
"Now that was just uncalled for." Rusty stated with Liam nodding in agreement. They had to feel for a fellow ginger after all. "Although I bet Lincoln's excited for this challenge. I heard he used to love paintball."
"Oh you better believe it." Clyde confirmed as he smiled as fond memories came to him. "Him and his pop-pop used to go paintballing all the time. They even took me a few times. Man, I still can't believe what a shot Lincoln's pop-pop is."
"So we won't be killing anything?" Bridgette asked with crossed arms.
"Negatory." Chris confirmed making Bridgette smile. Dawn breathed a sigh of relief as Lincoln put a reassuring hand on her shoulder with Edward on his lap. The gesture making Dawn blush a bit. "This is the first ever paintball deer hunt. I'll announce the team's once we get into the woods. So…finish breaky."
Just then a loud burp got everyones attention and making them all look to Owen who already had a bunch of emptied cans around him with beans staining his body. "Aaaaah…" Owen let out in satisfaction. "Got any more?"
About 45 minutes later, the teams were all gathered up near the woods with Chris having a trunk next to him as well as a rack with paintball guns set up on it. "And now for the team breakdowns." Chris announced as he took all the Bass red guns off the rack. "The Killer Bass hunters are…Harold, Lincoln, Geoff, and Bridgette. Locked and loaded with bass blue paint." Chris then threw the four guns to the hunters for the Bass. Lincoln in particular having a big grin on his face as he caught his gun.
CONFESSIONAL – LINCOLN
"Yes! Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!" Lincoln cheered while raising his paintball gun in the air while wearing a camo cap and yellow hunting shades. "This is so awesome! I haven't been painting ball since I was 13! My pop-pop taught me how and he could out gun navy seals with an arm tied behind his back! Pop-pop, if you're watching this is for you!"
"I rest my case." Clyde smirked with crossed arms as the rest of the group agreed to go paint balling with Lincoln once he was back home.
"And using orange paint are the Gopher hunters." Chris said as he grabbed the green guns off the rack. "Leshawna, Beth, Owen, Lindsay."
"Whahoo!" Owen cheered as he and the three other Gopher hunters caught their guns. "This is awesome man!"
"You also get these stylin' glasses and wicked camo caps!" Chris said as he reached into the trunk and pulled out said items. "The rest of you are now deer. Here are your antlers, noses, and little whitetails." Chris pulled out a headband with deer antlers attached, red deer noses, and belts with a little deer tail attached.
Dawn clapped and eagerly went to go get her deer costume with the other deer from both teams looking less than happy at their wardrobe. "Yeah right." Heather rolled her eyes and crossed her arms. "I am not wearing that."
"There is no way I'm a deer." Duncan growled in protest. He should have been a hunter, not a freakin deer!
"Oh this is gonna be good!" Zach rubbed his hands together eagerly. It was gonna be pure gold to see Duncan and Heather in those deer costumes. Guess the old saying was true. Karma's a bitch.
"Though looks like Dawn can't wait to put hers on." Liam commented as they all watched Dawn eagerly grabbed and put her deer costume on. "Guess the little lady loves embracing animals as well. Maybe ah should try that with mah pigs."
"I don't feel like you need the costume Liam." Stella chuckled a bit. Liam was really already one with his pigs since he wrestles them nearly every night before bed. The costume was unneeded at this point.
"Take these off and your team is toast." Chris said as he proceeded to put the deer gear on Duncan. On the bright side, they also got the shades the hunters got.
Chuckling was then heard from behind Duncan with the delinquent looking to see Owen grinning at him from behind. "What are you lookin' at?"
"Oh nothing." Owen continued grinning at Duncan with narrowed eyes on the delinquent's tail. "Bambi." Owen then grabbed Duncan's tail and pulled it back and proceeded to snap it by letting it go.
"You better be a good shot, tubby!" Duncan threatened the big guy.
CONFESSIONAL – DAWN
"I don't know what everyone's complaining about." Dawn said with a smile and proudly wearing her deer stuff. "These are great! I truly feel one with nature's beautiful creatures like this."
"Hey she does look kinda cute with those things on~" Rusty commented with a sly smirk only to be met with an elbow to one of his love handles. "Ow! What was that for?!"
"Back off Rusty." Zach warned the ginger. "Lincoln's already got dibs." Rusty simply crossed his arms and grumpily grumbled to himself.
"Wow…" Lincoln let out as he looked at Dawn adjusting her tail.
"What?" Dawn asked as she turned to the white head who was all decked out in his hunter gear.
"O-O-Oh, um, n-nothing!" Lincoln sheepishly grinned and stuttered as he tried to look away from Dawn. "You just…look really cute with that deer stuff is all."
"Aaaawww." Dawn let out as she blushed a bit. "Thank you."
CONFESSIONAL – DAWN
"Eeeeeeeeh!" Dawn excitedly squealed.
"Ok, I gotta look something up." Stella said as she quickly got out her phone and started typing away while all the guys were grinning and approving of the 'moves' Lincoln was making on Dawn. "Oh my gosh! There is one!"
"There's what?" Clyde asked curiously as the guys all turned to Stella.
"Ok, so you all know how these sorts of reality shows have those blogs about shipping two people together?" Stella asked with all the guys nodding. They weren't avid Reality Show watchers but they were aware of a ton of blogs bent on pairing people together. "Well check this one out! There's a blog for Lincoln and Dawn!"
Sure enough, the guys eyes widened as Stella showed off a blog labeled "Dawncoln is best TD ship" and it featured quite a lot of stuff. From various screen shots of the two together, clips of their interactions, even a few pieces of fanart. "Damn!" Rusty let out as Stella scrolled through the page a bit. "That was fast!"
"You're telling me." Clyde said with an amazed look. "I can't believe my best friend is both a TV star, and now has his own blog dedicated to his relationship! This is a massive milestone?"
"Who made it?" Liam asked curiously.
"Let me see…" Stella said slowly as she turned the phone back to her to see who was the creator of the blog. "look like some girl with the user name…Codyluver4life."
"Looks like Cody's got some fans as well." Zach couldn't help but chuckle a bit as the blog making girl obviously seemed to have a fan girl crush on Cody.
KILLER BASS – DEER
The deer of the Killer Bass team, Dawn, DJ, Duncan, Courtney, and Sadie, were now all seen walking through the woods. Chris told them the deer had a 15-minute head start to get into the woods and hide. "At least we get a head start." Courtney sighed out as she along with Duncan weren't too thrilled about being deer for this game.
"I don't know about ya'll, but I'm outta here!" DJ then did something that surprised nearly everyone on his team. The brick house got down on all fours and started prancing away just like a real deer would. Duncan and Courtney's jaw dropped at the sight with Sadie's eyes widening.
"He's really in tune with nature." Dawn complimented as she smiled at DJ releasing his inner deer. The aura reader then turned to her teammates and said. "I think I should be heading off to. I need to go meet up with some friends of mine!" Similar to DJ, Dawn proceeded to get on all fours and instead of prancing, simply walked away into the woods like a deer would.
"Why are all the tree huggers on our team again?" Courtney asked no one in particular.
"…I…don't know what to say about this…" Zach slowly said with everyone else stunned silent. "I mean, I expected it from Dawn but not DJ…"
"Takes all kinds I guess?" Stella simply decided to just shrug it off and keep watching.
SCREAMING GOPHERS - DEER
Currently the Gopher deer, Heather, Cody, Gwen, and Trent, were also walking through the woods and making the most of their head start with all of them expect Cody not too happy about the whole being deer thing. "This is easily the lamest thing I've ever done in my life." Gwen complained.
"Aw come on." Cody encouraged everyone with a smile and tried to bring spirits up. "It could be fun!" However, the only thing the brown-haired boy got in return was glares from his fellow deer. "Okay, catch you later."
CONFESSIONAL – CODY
"I was so psyched to be a deer." Cody said with a grin…while wearing a full body cast and in a wheel chair. "I'm small, but I'm quick. Lots of practice from dodging spitballs in math class."
And everyone was once again completely silent. First they were completely taken off guard from DJ and Dawn embracing their inner deer. But now Cody was in the confessional wearing a full body cast? Now everyone was just completely confused and greatly concerned about how the tech geek ended up like that.
After Cody separated from the group, Gwen and Trent continued forward and stopped when they saw Heather sitting down on a stump and start filing her nails. "Are you coming?" Gwen asked with a raised brow.
"No." Heather rolled her eyes as she continued filing. "I'm going to wait for Lindsay and Beth and make them protect me for the whole game."
"Wouldn't that be against the rules?" Gwen asked with a raised brow. She couldn't care less if Heather followed them or not, heck she would prefer it if she didn't, but she didn't want the mean girl's attitude to cost them the challenge.
"Um, do you see a rules person anywhere?" Heather said with an annoyed tone as she gestured to the area around her. "Worry about your own fluffy tails."
"Callin it now." Liam spoke up with a raised hand. "She's gonna be taken down hard." Everyone nodded along with Liam and crossed their fingers that Heather would get her just desserts this challenge.
KILLER BASS – HUNTERS
"And break!" Harold said as he, Geoff, and Lincoln grinned as they brought their hands together before raising them up in the air. Bridgette did too but didn't look as enthusiastic as the three boys. Putting on their glasses, Harold looked to see Bridgette looking at her paintball gun with a frown. "Okay. You do realize that this is all just pretend, right? And that it's just paint?" Harold explained to Bridgette that they weren't actually hunting and killing real deer. Or killing anything in general. "So say, if you…like, hit Heather…"
"Wait. Heather's a deer?" Bridgette's mood took an instant 180 as she put on her glasses and held her gun with her thumb eagerly on the trigger. "Hohoho…"
"Just remember you aren't the only one who wants a piece of her." Lincoln stated as he twirled his gun around. "You guys cool if I go on my own commando style?"
"Go ahead man." Geoff encouraged. "Probably best to cover more ground that way."
Lincoln grinned eagerly as he gripped his gun as Chris proceeded to speak to everyone through a megaphone. "Start your paintballs!" The host told everyone as he was about to give the hunters the go ahead to start hunting their fellow campers. "Game on!"
"Alright!" Beth cheered as she raised her gun in the air. "Let's go bag some deer!"
"Aha! I am down with that!" Leshawna excitedly agreed with Beth…as they and Lindsay watched Owen splash some yellow liquid onto himself.
"What are you doing?" Lindsay asked with a confused tone.
"Masking my scent so the deer don't smell me coming." Owen said as he prepared to go into full hunter mode.
Beth and Leshawna cringed in disgust, with Lindsay still looking confused, as they both figured out what Owen was doing exactly. "Tell me that isn't…"
"Pee?" Owen finished Leshawna's sentence with the nod of his head. "Yes. Yes, it is!"
"Eeeeeww!" Beth and Lindsay said in unison.
"Ugh…" Clyde, Zach, and Rusty let out in disgust. Meanwhile Stella wasn't able to make any sounds as her face turned green, her cheeks puffed up, and she put her hands over her mouth to keep herself from puking at the scene.
The only one who didn't cringe in disgust was Liam who didn't really react to the scene much at all. "Meh." The farmer shrugged getting all eyes on him. "Been covered in worse stuff." Everyone was silent and merely scooted away from the farmer.
"We're hunting other campers." Beth told the big guy while backing away from him. "You don't have to hide your scent."
"You mean I collected all this pee for nothing?" Owen complained before throwing a jar of collected pee away with Beth and Lindsay running away screaming so it didn't hit them.
"Dude." Leshawna shook her head before walking away. "You are one sick ticket."
The Bass all watched this and cringed a bit before walking into the woods themselves. Harold, Bridgette, and Geoff stuck together while Lincoln went off on his own. But there was one more looking to go out into the woods. Specifically, to follow Lincoln. "Brbrbr!" Waddling after the white head was Edward the platypus who had somehow put a camo cap on his head.
"Not so fast little dude." Suddenly stopping the platypus was the foot of the host of the show himself who was looking down at the platypus. "You're not playing."
"Brbrbrbr!" Edward let out angrily at Chris.
"Here's the thing, you're not a competitor." Chris begun explaining why Edward couldn't go out into the woods and play the game with the contestants. "Also, ever since the hawk I got a bunch of angry emails from animal rights activists. And seeing a Platypus get shot with paintballs is just gonna cause more problems for me. So, you stay here." Edward simply narrowed his eyes at Chris but decided to comply and walk away from the woods. "I got my eye on you."
"Hehehehe." Liam chuckled as he looked at Edward on the screen. "Ah know the look in that critter's eyes. He's got something planned."
With Beth and Lindsay, the two Gopher hunters were looking rather tired as they continued going through the woods. So far their hunt was rather uneventful as they have yet to even see a deer let alone shoot one. "Aw, man." Beth grunted as she looked around the area she and the dumb blond were at. "We're back to where we started and we haven't seen one deer."
"Ahem." The sound of someone aggressively clearing their throat got the two girls' attention as they looked to see Heather sitting on a stump and glaring at them. "What took you so long?
"Were we supposed to come find you?" Beth asked the mean girl with a confused tone.
"Hello?" Heather said as if the situation was obvious. Especially to her two alliance members that she bossed around. "Alliance, anyone?"
"Ooh! Ooh!" Lindsay excitedly raised her hand. "Can I be in one?"
"You already are Lindsay! That's the point!" Heather yelled at the dumb blond and clearly wasn't in the mood to deal with any of Lindsay's stupidity. "Now go find me some berries! I'm starving!"
"Woohoo!" Lindsay, without even thinking about it, simply did as Heather said and went to go look for berries out in the woods.
"Shouldn't we be, y'know, hunting?" Beth spoke up to Heather, thinking that it would just be a waste of challenge time to go find the queen bee food.
"She is hunting. For me." Heather informed Beth before putting a finger to her chin. "But actually, berries won't be enough. Go get me some chips."
"In the forest?" Beth asked, very confused at Heather's request.
"In the dinning hall. Now." Heather ordered as she pointed in the direction of camp. Beth simply sighed and ultimately decided to go along with it and started walking back towards camp in a slump. "And not barbeque!"
"Woah! Woah! Woah! Woah! Woah!" A suddenly enraged Rusty yelled in response to Heather's words. "How can you NOT like barbeque?!"
"Yes." Stella deadpanned at Rusty. "Because that's the thing to be concerned about right now Rusty."
"Ah'm tellin ya'll." Liam said as he reclined on the couch. "That girl is just asking for trouble."
"As if it wasn't obvious already." Clyde glared at Heather before smiling as he realized something. "On the bright side, this gives Linc's team a better shot at winning."
CONFESSIONAL – BETH
"Ok…heather can be sooo bossy!" Beth ranted out angrily as she's had it up to here with Heather and her attitude. "And in nature, hunters would never go find food for the deer! …Heather won't hear this, right?"
"Come on Beth…" Stella quietly cheered the braces wearing girl on. "Break free from that bitch…"
THE HUNTER
"The hunter is a finely tuned machine. His senses heightened by the thrill of the chase." Owen was currently putting his focus into the max. He narrated his hunting journey for himself as he kept his eyes peeled for any Bass members wearing antlers and tails. Sniffing the air, Owen spotted something and quietly tiptoed over to it. Hiding behind a large enough push, Owen peaked and saw DJ still embracing his inner deer as shown by the teen munching on some grass. "Suddenly, our hunter spots a magnificent buck in the clearing. If he's to succeed, the hunter must demonstrate patience and control."
Just then Owen failed this second step as he snuck next to a bush closer to DJ…and proceeded to fart. Both Owen and DJ's eyes widened at this as DJ quickly looked around to see where the source of the noise was coming from.
"Patience and Control." Clyde listed out as all the boys chuckled at the scene while Stella was a bit disgusted. Just typical guy behavior to laugh at farts she guessed. "Things Owen should probably work on."
"His patience seems fine." Stella pointed out. "It's the control part he really needs to work on."
Owen managed to keep it down long enough for DJ to simply forget about it and start munching on grass again as a bird proceeded to perch a top his antler hat. "The hunter moves in, aware of every proton in his environment." Owen started quietly narrating again as he got ready to shoot the Bass deer in front of him…only for a large snake to slither onto the big guy making him stand up from his hiding place. "Aw crap!" Owen yelled as he threw the snake away from him.
Needless to say, DJ noticed this and quickly started to run away like a deer would. "Haha! It's on, DJ!" Owen gripped his gun as he started chasing after the brick house. "Your butt's a hamburger and I'm one hot barbeque!"
And chase he did. No matter what, Owen refused to let up on DJ. The big guy never took his eyes off the brick house and tried to take shot after shot of him with DJ managing to avoid the hits so far. "You're my burger now, DJ!" Owen yelled while panting. And like a true hunter, Owen refused to let up on his hunt for DJ.
Even after hitting his jewels against a rock, being led through a bunch of thorn bushes, and getting chased by a bunch of racoons, Owen refused to let up on DJ and continued to chase after him and continued to shoot at him and unfortunately miss.
But things seemed to be looking up for Owen. Quite literally. Owen had managed to chase DJ all the way up the 1000-foot cliff the campers all went up for their first challenge. DJ was chased all the way to the edge of the cliff with nowhere left to run. Beads of sweat went down DJ's head as Owen was right in front of him and aiming the paintball gun right at him. "You're mine now deer!" Owen said as he looked right into DJ's eyes.
"Oooooo." Zach winced a bit as Owen aimed his gun at DJ. "Don't know how DJ is gonna get out of this one."
"Unless…" Stella spoke up as she pointed to the screen.
With his gun pointed right at DJ, Owen put his thumb to the trigger…and nothing happened. Only clicking sounds were heard no matter how many times Owen pushed it. Owen grew nervous as DJ's nervous look soon turned into a glare. "Um, the hunter knows that his prey will stay there for a moment, paralyzed in…uh, fear?" DJ didn't do anything Owen said with his narration as the brick house stomped right in front of Owen. "And respect? The deer cannot best the hunter." DJ now looked down at Owen as the big guy nervously laughed and tried to back away from DJ. "Hey, dude. C'mon now. Let's talk about this."
The only thing DJ did was pick up Owen, throw him down the cliff, and happily started running down the cliff.
"Man, talk about bad luck." Rusty pointed out before realizing what he said. "Wait a minute…that curse…"
"Ya'll thinking what I'm thinking?" Liam asked as his friends nodded their head.
"I don't think Beth just cursed herself." Stella pointed out with a bit of a worried look. While the Gophers were the opposing team to the Bass, the team Lincoln was on, she didn't wish for anyone to be cursed…other than Heather. "She might have cursed her whole team!"
"….At least Heather's also cursed." Zach pointed out as he tried to look on the bright side of the situation. "And that last part was all DJ's choice."
"Surprised he ended up doing that." Clyde said as from what he's watched of the brickhouse, it seems that he's mostly a pacifist and wouldn't wanna hurt anyone. "Guess everyones got their limits when it comes to tolerance."
"Ahahahaha! Oh man! I didn't think DJ had it in him." Chris wiped a tear of laughter from his eye. Currently the host was sticking around at the camp ground and had a tv set up so he could watch everything going on with the game. The host was also keeping an eye on a certain platypus and making sure he didn't go off.
Little did Chris know at the moment, that he failed at this.
"See? Isn't it much more fun to watch?" Chris said as he looked down at where Edward was…only to see a log that was about the same size as Edward with a hunter's cap on it and a frozen waffle taped to back. Looking at the camera, Chris said. "Huh, this show just keeps getting weirder."
"Called it!" Liam called out making his friends chuckle.
"Where'd he get the waffle?" Stella questioned with a raised brow.
Owen wasn't the only Gopher having a pretty rotten time. Beth herself wasn't having too much fun. The braces wearing girl was walking through the woods with a frown and a bag of chips under her arm, not knowing that the bag had a hole in the corner. Just then Beth heard some rustling in the bushes behind her and said. "Whoever you are, go ahead. Shoot me. You can't make today any suckier!"
Just then the deer hiding in the bush emerged and was revealed to be Cody. "A. We're on the same team." Cody listed out to Beth. "B. You're a hunter, I'm a deer. Slight food chain issue with me shooting you. How goes it?"
"I'm so done with this game." Beth yelled in irritation as she glared forward.
"What happened?" Cody asked, a bit worried about Beth due to how she was acting right now. "Have you bagged any deer yet?"
"No." Beth shook her head as she held up the bag of chips she stole from Chef earlier and somehow managed to escape with her life. "But I did risk my life to steal a bag of chips!"
"What took you so long?" The two brown heads then approached Heather, who was still sitting on her stump, with the queen bee glaring impatiently at Beth.
"Here." Beth held the chip bag out for Heather. "I hope you know what I had to go through to get those."
Heather rudely swiped the chips away from Beth before looking inside. "There's like…eleven chips left." Heather complained before sniffing them and recoiling in disgust. "And they're Barbeque! Go exchange them for dill pickle!"
Heather threw the bag of chips on the ground in front of Beth and crossed her arms, expecting Beth to follow her orders. Beth was about to and reached down to collect the chip bag…but stopped. She was sick of Heather. Doing everything she said while Heather just leaned back and made her and Lindsay do all the work. And with one word, Beth showed she was done with this.
"No."
"YES!" Stella cheered with so much enthusiasm that she stood up from the couch and raised her hands up in the air. "SUCK IT HEATHER!"
"Oh this is gonna be good…" Zach enthusiastically said as he made sure Clyde was recording this episode so they would be able to relive this moment over and over again.
"Cat fight! Cat fight! Cat fight! Cat fight! Cat fight!" Is what Rusty was hoping would happen.
Heather and Cody gasped. The former couldn't believe it. Her underling had the nerve to say no. To her! That was not acceptable at all. "What did you just say?" Heather growled as she glared right at Beth.
"I'm just gonna…yeah." Cody was quick to get the heck outta dodge and run away…while also taking the chip bag with him.
"Take it back." Heather immediately ordered Beth.
Beth took a deep breath and worked up the courage to say the word once again to Heather's face. "No."
"Take. It. Back." Heather ordered once again as she refused to have someone like Beth stand up to her.
"No, I'm tired of being your slave." Beth yelled right into Heather's face. The braces wearing girl refused to back down and no longer cared about Heather's promise to get her and Lindsay into the final three. She knew who Heather was now and she refused to be a part of her little alliance for a single second more. Not giving Heather a second glance, Beth started to walk away while gripping her gun tightly. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have a challenge to complete."
"Bravo Beth! Bravo!" Stella clapped happily. While Beth cursed her team, it's not like she meant to or even knew, Stella couldn't help but feel proud of the girl for finally freeing herself from Heather's grasp. "I'm so happy for her."
"That was hardly a cat fight…" Rusty complained only to get lightly punched in the shoulder by Liam.
"Now all that's left is to dump a bucket of water on her head." Liam commented as he rubbed his hands together eagerly.
"While I do believe Heather is a witch…" Clyde pointed out to his farmer friend. "I doubt that's gonna work. We've already seen her get wet before."
"Dayum!" Liam snapped his fingers in response.
CONFESSIONAL – LINCOLN
"Things were looking pretty bleak for me at first." Lincoln began with a smirk on his face. "I couldn't find a single Gopher deer no matter how hard I looked. I thought they all hid way to well…but then not too far away I hear someone arguing with another someone. Beth, a hunter, and Heather…a deer ripe for the shooting." Lincoln then twirled his gun around and looked right into the camera. "Beth, I owe ya one."
"Don't worry Liam." Zach said as a grin came to his face. "Something tells me the next best thing is about to happen."
A few minutes after Beth had stood up to Heather, the queen bee was completely seething in rage. That little dweeb stood up to her. HER! The only member of the Screaming Gophers that wasn't a complete loser. Heck, probably the entire island. She took her under her wing and agreed to help Beth reach the top three. And this is how she repays her?! She was going to pay!
So, standing up the queen bee was about to go find Lindsay and tell her about this when-
SPLAT!
"AH!" Heather screamed in pain as she was suddenly shot right in the forehead with a blue paint ball that sent her to the ground.
"Hahahaha! Boom!" Heather growled at the voice as she knew who it was. Emerging from the bush was none other than Lincoln with him grinning at the fallen form of Heather. "Headshot!"
"YES!" Everyone watching cheered in unison. It was at that moment that they've never felt prouder of Lincoln. "GO LINCOLN!"
You!" Heather yelled as she glared right at Lincoln with a ferocious look. But the white head wasn't intimidated in the slightest. "You are going to pay for that do you hear me?!"
"Huh, still breathing." Lincoln smirked down at the 'deer'. Heather flinched as Lincoln aimed his gun point blank at her body. "Better finish the job."
"Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!" Heather continually let out as Lincoln shot her repeatedly at point blank range. After about ten shots, Lincoln finally let out and left Heather with blue paint that stained practically her whole body.
"Welp, that outta do it." Lincoln said with a satisfied tone as he strapped his gun to his back. "Paint ya later Heather!"
Heather glared and growled hard at the Loud boy as he took off running. The queen bee quickly got up and had every intention of chasing Lincoln down so she could make him suffer. "Get back here you ba-" But before Heather could finish or go forward, she proceeded to trip on something and fall face first to the ground.
"Brbrbrbr!"
"Hey Chris, we found Edward." Rusty said in a joking tone.
"Man Heather really isn't having a good day today." Stella chuckled with a grin on her face. "Serves her right."
"Now what's that critter planning?" Liam questioned with a smirk on his face. He could tell Edward was thinking something. And that something was gonna be something to watch to say the least.
"What?" Heather let out as she looked to what she had tripped on and saw…Edward. "You!" Heather growled as she stood back up and aggressively picked the platypus up and glared right at its face. "I swear when this is over I'm going to make a purse out of you!"
STAB!
Heather eyes widened as she felt a sudden pain in her arm. Looking, she saw Edward had stabbed some sort of barb attached to his ankle into her arm. Heather was about to say something…but soon felt every part of her body grow numb as she first dropped Edward on the ground before completely falling down, frozen and unable to get up or even move and speak.
Once Heather was down, Edward proceeded to crawl on top of the queen bee's back…and proceeded to pee on her. Once every bit of yellow liquid was drained from the platypus and onto the mean girl, Edward smacked Heather with his tail about before waddling away and leaving the paralyzed Heather behind.
"…" Everyone was silent as Clyde paused the TV. All of them had frozen expression and could only have the scene play in their heads over and over…and over again. First, Lincoln shot Heather quite a number of times. Then Heather tripped on Edward the Platypus. And then said platypus proceeded to sting Heather with his poisonous barb. Finally, to add insult to injury, Edward peed on Heather. There was only one way any rational person could respond to this…
"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" All five of Lincoln's friends proceeded to laugh harder than they ever have before in their lives. All of them were either clenching their guts, had happy tears coming out of their eyes, and/or fell off the couch in their laughter.
"HAHAHAHA! OH…OH…OH MY GOSH!" Stella said in between her breaths, being one of the five to suffer all three effects, while continuing to laugh her ass of. "I CAN'T BREATHE! AHAHA! IT HURTS BUT IT FEELS RIGHT!"
"AH I KNEW THAT CRITTER WAS PLANNING SOMETHING, HAHAHAHAHA!" Liam laughed as he tried his best dry his eyes off. "BUT THAT TAKES THE CAKE!"
"Ok…hahaha…it's official…" Clyde said as he managed to get his laughter to die down so he could actually start breathing again. "Platypuses are my new favorite, hehehe, animals..."
"Agreed…" Rusty said as he took some deep breaths while trying to slow his heart rate. "Man, this is the best episode yet."
"Oh I'm gonna be watching this again later." Zach said as he was determined to find this online later just so he could watch that part over and over again. Maybe even make a gif of this. "Ok, everyone calm now?" Everyone was still trying to get their breath back but for the most part they were calm enough to where they could watch everything again. "Ok, let's start things up again." Zach then unpaused the TV.
"Two hours of sneakin' around in the woods and I haven't shot a darn thing." With Leshawna, the girl was currently facing a problem a few of the hunters from both teams were having. She was struggling to find any of the deer campers. "What kind of messed up person actually does this for fun?"
Rustle
Leshawna silently gasped as she heard rustling coming from nearby. Tip toeing quietly, Leshawna peaked to where she heard the rustling The Gopher hunters' eyes widened as she saw none other than Bass Deer Dawn walking through the woods on all fours and mimicking an actual deer.
"What is that white girl doing?" Leshawna whispered as she carefully watched Dawn and made sure not to make any loud noises. "Welp, ain't my business that's for sure. Time to finally get one in."
"I feel like she's about to eat those words." Stella said as she finally managed to regulate her breathing and got her heart rate back to normal.
Leshawna then aimed her gun at Dawn…only for the aura reader to suddenly gasp and get on her two legs and start running away. She may not have seen Leshawna, but she sensed her and knew she was there. "What?!" Leshawna yelled out as she started to chase after Dawn. "How'd she know I was…ah who am I kiddin nothing bout that girl makes any sense."
"Amen to that." Zach agreed before putting a hand to his chin. "I wonder if she's an alien…"
"Zach, she's not an alien." Stella said firmly before a curious look came to her face. "Maybe a wizard though…"
"You'll never get me alive!" Dawn yelled as she ran from Leshawna as fast as she could. Leshawna tried to shoot at her and aimed directly at her…but Dawn proved that she was full of even more surprises. Without even looking, the aura reader managed to dodge all of Leshawn's paint balls. From duck and rolling when Leshawna aimed at her head, side stepping away from body shots, and even doing something truly incredible as when Leshawna aimed at her legs, Dawn jumped up and did a perfect split in mid-air and land perfectly on her feet and kept up her sprint.
CONFESSIONAL – LESHAWNA
"Ok, that girl's never touched a piece of meat in her life." Leshawna said while giving an incredibly confused look as to how Dawn was able to move like that. "How on earth does someone get moves like that from just eating leaves?"
"Wow!" Clyde said in an impressed tone. "She just keeps busting out surprise after surprise."
"Nuh uh girl!" But despite the incredible dodging skills, Leshawna refused to let up on Dawn and kept the heat on her and tried her best to somehow get a shot on her. "You ain't getting away from me!"
"Eeeep!" Dawn let out as she managed to dodge another one of Leshawna's shots. Sensing some nearby obstacles along the way, Dawn put her hands around her mouth and called out. "Creatures of mother nature please lend me your aid!"
Leshawna rose her brow, but her eyes soon widened when she heard birds chirping and watched as a bunch of birds both big and small flew over to Dawn and all picked her up and proceeded to carry the aura girl through the air with relative ease. Leshawna stopped running and couldn't help but watch the scene with a dropped jaw. "...Man that white girl is weird." Leshawna then snapped out of it and kept her eyes on the birds carrying the girl and chased after them.
"Well…Ah've heard weirder ways to shake off hunters…" Liam admitted getting everyone to look at him strangely.
THE HUNTER
Owen could be seen back on dry land with his entire body dripping with water. He was wet, tired, cold, and most likely hungry. But still, "You can leave the hunter with less ammo than he thought he had. You can throw him over a cliff. You can even leave him with a case of toe crabs." Owen emptied a small crab out of his shoe before throwing his shoe to the ground and raising his arms up. "BUT YOU CAN NOT…BREAK HIS SPIRIT!"
"You gotta admit, Owen's determined." Stella said as she couldn't help but admire Owen's determination and persistence a bit.
Rustle
Owen's eyes immediately locked onto an area he heard rustle. Hiding in the bushes, Owen's eyes locked onto what he saw. The Bass deer Duncan walking all by himself. "Fresh meat." Owen rubbed his hands together as he grinned at his next hunt.
So as quiet as he could, Owen stalked Duncan. He had one paintball left and he had to make it count. So the big hunter kept his distance while keeping a close eye on the delinquent and his movements. Soon enough, Owen found himself up a tree and looking down at Duncan as he stopped to take a drink from the river. "This is the shot of the day." Owen narrated quietly as he watched Duncan take a sip of water with his hands. "With one paintball, hunter and prey's mutual destinies will be fulfilled."
Pffffffttttt!
"And once again his farts are his downfall…" Stella quickly went back to deadpanning as the guys snickered at the farts coming from Owen.
Owen flinched a bit as he found himself unable to contain a fart. Duncan quickly noticed this and took a whiff of the air. "Beans…" Duncan whispered before grinning and looking up at the tree. "Owen!" As Duncan called the hunters name, Owen found himself farting some more. "Nice try Farticus! You almost had me!"
Duncan then ran away leaving Owen to release another fart that blew the leaves off of the tree he was on...and then fell into a puddle of mud.
"Oooooo…" Everyone winced at Owen's fall.
CONFESSIONAL – CODY
"I thought it was a cinch to win." Cody said while still in a body cast for some reason. "I almost made it all the way through without being hit by a single paintball."
"Oh boy." Clyde let out as he and everyone else felt like they were about to learn why Cody was in the full body cast.
Cody sighed in satisfaction as he finished the bag of chips he 'got' from Beth and proceeded to throw the bag over his shoulder. "Aaaaah, gotta love barbeque." Cody sighed in satisfaction as he patted his stomach. Just then the geek spotted some blue berry bushes next to him. Some of them had been picked, but there was still plenty to spare. "Mmmm, berries." Cody then started picking some blueberries for himself and-
"Grrrrrr…"
Everyones eyes widened as they heard the vicious growling coming from the TV.
Cody flinched at the sound of a vicious growl coming from behind him. Slowly looking, Cody's eyes widened as he saw a big grizzly bear standing behind him with its face covered in chip crumbs. Yep, the bear had been following Cody for quite a while at this point as the hole that was in the chip bag that Cody had meant that chip crumbs were constantly falling out and making a trail for the bear to follow.
"Eyy, big fella." Cody nervously said to the big bear. Cody then quickly gathered up some berries and held them out to the bear hoping that would appease it and get it to leave him alone. "Want some berries?"
But all the bear did was roar at Cody and I believe we all know what comes next.
"…Welp…" Liam let out as everyone looked at the screen with horrified looks. "Guess that solves that mystery."
"Get back here!" Leshawna shot up in the air at Dawn as the birds continued to fly her through the air. Currently the girl with the tude was covered in mud, scratches, and her hair was a mess. Unlike Dawn who had the help of the birds to fly her over the area, Leshawna had to go through everything in her path to get to Dawn which include pits of mud, a small area of sharp rocks, and a few thorny plants and bushes. "How long…can those birds…carry her around…"
But just then, Leshawna's wish came true as she saw the birds start to lower Dawn to the ground. The Gopher hunter grinned as she speeded up and headed towards the area where the birds were dropping Dawn off at. "You ain't gettin away from me now!"
Dawn was quick to thank her bird friends before they flew away after they dropped her off. The area Dawn was at was a land mark in the shape of a perfect circle with only grass in the area with the trees acting as a barrier for this rather unique part of the island.
Dawn heard rustling coming from within the trees, but didn't panic, as she looked to see Leshawna come into the area. Breathing heavily, Leshawna glared at Dawn as she pointed her gun at the Bass deer. "Ain't…got nowhere…to go now…girl…" Leshawna said in between breaths as she put her thumb on the trigger.
"Hmmmm, true." Dawn hummed a bit as she looked around but remained calm. "But before you shoot me…allow me to introduce you to my friends." Leshawna rose an eyebrow as Dawn let out a high-pitched whistle.
It was quiet…to quiet. Leshawna felt a chill go up her spine that urged her to look around the area. Just then, rustling was heard from the entire border of the circular area. Eventually many creatures started to emerge from the woods and into the round open area.
Deer.
Real deer.
"Oh man…" Stella sheepishly let out along with a nervous chuckle. "Never thought deer could be so…intimidating."
"She's like Aqua Man but with deer." Rusty let out in an amazed tone.
Leshawna felt beads of sweats come down her head as she saw bucks, doe, and fawn of different sizes emerge from the woods. All of them glaring right at Leshawna. The Gopher hunter gulped audibly as she tried to back away…only to walk backwards into something.
Slowly looking, Leshawna flinched as she looked to see an incredibly large buck with sharp antlers glaring down right at her. The buck released steam from its nose right into Leshawna's face that made the Gopher quickly get away from it.
Leshawna then looked back to Dawn and saw the aura reader looking right at her with crossed arms and narrowed eyes. Looking around nervously, Leshawna new that if she shot Dawn, or any of the deer around her, she'd be in big trouble. So, seeing no other way, Leshawna dropped her gun and raised her hands in the area in defeat.
Dawn nodded as all the deer around them stomped their feet on the ground as their form of cheering. "Attention human wildlife and hunters!" Suddenly Chris's voice was heard through the woods making everyone present, both human and deer, looking up. "Please report back to camp! It's time to show your hides and tally up the scores!"
"Welp, guess its time to head back." Dawn said as she started walked towards Leshawna. Just then the Gopher girl flinched a bit as she saw the massive buck walked past her and lower itself towards the ground and allowed Dawn to hop onto its back like a horse. The aura reader then looked to Leshawna and patted the bucks back. "Want a ride?"
Leshawna's eyes widened a little bit. She wasn't expecting that offer. "For real?" The girl with a tude asked.
"Of course." Dawn kindly said with no hint of malicious intent in her tone or aura. "The games over so there's no need to compete anymore. And it looks like you've been through enough already."
"Ain't that the truth." Leshawna couldn't help but laugh a bit as she climbed onto the buck along with Dawn. "Thanks girl." Dawn simply nodded and asked the buck to take them back to camp to which the large deer happily complied.
"Aaaww, that was really nice of Dawn." Clyde happily said as his respect for Dawn only went up due to this episode. "Nice to see she's a fair winner."
"She'll be perfect for Lincoln." Stella said as she and Clyde fist bumped to that.
"Tsk, tsk, tsk." Chris let out as he paced back and forth. Currently all of the Bass and Gophers, with the exception of Duncan and Courtney for the Bass and Heather and Lindsay for Gophers, were lined up back at camp. Cody, having been the victim of a bear mauling, was currently in the infirmary tent in a full body cast, only his eyes visible past all the bandages and cast. Owen was currently covered in mud and bruises, Leshawna was in the same state she was in earlier, Sadie was the only Bass deer to have orange paint anywhere on her body, and Gwen and Trent were found by Harold, Bridgette, and Geoff and had blue paint on them.
"Stealing from Chef. Eating chips in the woods. Being mauled by bears. Ticking off actual deer. Do you know what I see here? I see a very undisciplined group. I see a disgraceful mess. I see a massive waste of paint product. And I have to say…that was awesome!" Chris then started laughing perking up a few of the campers. "Epic chase scenes, disrespectful shots, and just so much happening all at once. Wicked TV guys."
"Boy I'll say." Rusty and everyone else grinned as they completely agreed with Chris in him saying that this episode was 'Wicked TV.' Between everything that's happened, only one sentence could describe this episode. "Best. Episode. Ever."
"Hey." Harold spoke up as he noticed the lack of two Bass. "Where are Duncan and Courtney?"
Just then grunting got everyones attention as they watched Duncan and Courtney come into the scene…while walking in unison due to their antler hats being tangled up. "Oh this is too much." Gwen smirked at the scene.
"Duncan." Owen said in between laughs. "You sly dog, you!"
"The girl can't keep her antlers off me." Duncan joked…which resulted in Courtney kicking him in the kiwis. "…Can't even bend over."
All the guys in the group instinctively covered their jewels and flinched in response to Courtney kicking Duncan's groin. Stella however smirked and crossed her arms. "Gotta love the benefits of being a girl." Stella commented getting all the guys to give her blank looks. When a boy hits a boy's groin, it was considered shameful. But when a girl did it, no one bats an eye.
"Easy Courtney. Our medical tent is really only equipped for one at a time and Cody's pretty messed up." Chris said while gesturing to Cody who could only blink in response to things right now. "Ok, the only ones unaccounted for are Lindsay and Heather."
"We're…right…here…" Everyone turned to the familiar voice and saw Lindsay walked towards everyone…while dragging around a still paralyzed Heather.
"It's like a piece of fine art." Zach commented as he and his friends watched with maximum levels of amusement.
"Woah!" Trent let out at the sight as Gwen and Heather and a few others laughed. "What happened to her."
"I have no idea." Lindsay said as she wiped some sweat off her head. "I went to go get her berries and when I came back I found her like this. There's a cut on her arm to."
Lindsay showed off the mark on Heather's arm making everyone raise a brow. What could it be? It didn't look like any sort of bite so a poisonous snake or bug was out of the question. It was also noted that Heather smelled rather bad. Before anyone could say anything about it, a rustling bush was heard and all the campers watched as Edward emerged from the woods and waddled towards Lincoln.
While Chris frowned a bit at the Platypus for sneaking past him, Lincoln was about to greet Edward…until he realized something. "Hey wait a minute…" Lincoln picked up Edward and looked at his legs and saw barbs attached to all of his ankles. "Don't platypus's have poisonous ankle barbs?"
"Yes." Dawn nodded, confirming the fact. "Male platypi have sharp barbs attached to their ankles that is usually used to escape from predators. And during mating season the poison efficiency can match a king cobra."
"Then wait…" DJ began as everyone looked between Heather and Edward. "That means…"
"Pffft, hahahahahah!" Suddenly Chris burst out laughing so hard that he had to constantly wipe away tears of laughter. "Ok! Edward…that is awesome! Forget what I said earlier, you are free to roam around during the challenges! You've convinced me!"
"Woohoo!" Everyone cheered at Chris' words with their happiness only growing every second.
"Glad to see he's come around." Rusty nodded his head in respect. "Gotta give respect to the platypus."
"And for his disrespect of Heather." Stella grinned.
Many of the challengers snickered in response until Courtney spoke up while plugging her nose. "But that still doesn't explain why Heather reeks."
"Brbrbrb." Edward said.
"He said he peed on her." Dawn inform everyone making them go quiet.
"…I love this platypus." Chris grinned while pointing to Edward. "Welp, seeing as both most of the Gophers are either covered in paint or injured in some way, I think we have our winner!" Chris then turned to the Killer Bass who all cheered in response. "You're off to a hunting camp shindig!"
The Bass continued cheering, except for Dawn who cringed at what their prize would be. "Yaaaay…" Dawn unenthusiastically let out.
Just then Lincoln put a hand on her shoulder and reassured her. "I'm sure they'll be salad there to." Dawn couldn't help but smile at Lincoln's attempts to cheer her up.
CONFESSIONAL – LINCOLN
"Well let's see." Lincoln began counting off why today was awesome. "I got to shoot Heather with a paintball gun, Heather's alliance is falling apart, and Edward peed on and paralyzed Heather…today was a good day. I wonder if they'll be more challenges with cute costumes for Dawn to where…please don't tell her I said that."
"Oh man…" Rusty chuckled and shook his head. "Yep, our white-headed friend has got it bad. So, how long do you think they finally become a thing?"
"Hopefully before one of them is kicked off." Clyde said with a worried tone. "Man if one of them was kicked off before that happens…"
"Hey, hey, don't worry Clyde." Stella quickly calmed her friend down by putting a hand to his shoulder. "I'm sure everything will be fine. Heck, maybe they'll even make it to the final two if things go really well."
"Well don't be sayin that just yet." Liam told Stella firmly. "Never know what could happen in one of these shows…"
"Guess we just gotta hope for the best." Zach said with everyone agreeing with him. With them only able to watch at home and have no way to contact Lincoln, that was the best they could do. "But come on. It's Linc! Man with the plan! He's got this!"
THAT NIGHT
"I mean, seriously. Twice in a row?" Heather complained to her team over their losing streak. The mean girl was now cured of her platypus venom and was leaving many of the Gophers wishing that it was platypus mating season when Edward stabbed Heather. "What is wrong with you people? I can't wait to see Beth get kicked off. The only thing I could probably want more is for it to be platypus season!"
CONFESSIONAL – CODY
"Heheheh. Okay. I know I got mauled by a bear, but I'm feeling good about this." Cody said with a confident tone. "I'm a quick healer. And besides, Heather's as mean as a snake, dude. Her own team laughed at her when she was injected with platypus venom and urine. They'll never kick me off."
CONESSFIONAL – LESHAWNA
"Who did I vote for?" Leshawna explained who got her vote. "Well, Heather's been a pain in my butt from day one. But I gotta say…Cody."
CONFESSIONAL – OWEN
"Yeah, that Cody." Owen ended up agreeing with Leshawna and also voted for the bear victim. "Not so useful in challenges anymore."
CONFESSIONAL – LINDSAY
"I totally admire Belle for standing up to Heather." Lindsay admitted as she had heard about everything that happened as soon as Heather was able to speak again. "But she's so dead now."
"Oh no…" Stella groaned as she put her hands on her face. "Can't believe they're gonna dump Cody instead of Heather."
"Can't blame em though." Liam stated as he gestured to Cody on the screen, full body cast and all. "He's not really gonna be all that helpful from now on…"
"Still!" Stella said with frustration. "Perfect chance to get rid of Heather and they don't take it."
"There are only seven marshmallows on this plate." Chris told everyone has he held up the plate full of marks of safety. "When I call your name, come up and claim your marshmallow. The camper-"
"Who does not receive a marshmallow must immediately return The Dock of Shame, catch the Boat of Losers and leave." Gwen interrupted Chris and quickly said the rest of the host's speech that he said every single ceremony. "Can't we just get this over with?"
"…Fine. Whatever. Spoil the moment." Chris frowned at Gwen but ultimately decided to go along with the Goth's request. "Trent. Lindsay. Owen. Gwen. Leshawna." Chris quickly listed off the five Gophers who would be staying and threw them marshmallows. Beth was shaking in her stump and crossing her fingers as Heather glared at her and ran a finger through her neck. "Beth."
Heather was immediately caught off guard by this as Beth was tossed a marshmallow. Heather found herself actually…worried. There was one marshmallow and only two campers without marshmallows. Herself…and Cody. "Campers, this is the final marshmallow tonight." Chris told everyone as Heather tried to keep her cool with Cody only being able to blink as Chris was silent for an incredibly tense moment before announcing who would be staying. "Heather."
"There's a shock…" Zach sarcastically grumbled.
The second Chris said her name, the queen bee quickly snatched the marshmallow and glared at her team. "You are all lucky, okay? Very lucky!" Heather yelled to everyone quickly making a few of them regret their decision to get rid of Cody.
"Bet they're regretting their choice now…" Stella muttered with an unamused look aimed at Heather.
"Cody. The Dock of Shame awaits, bro." Chris told poor wheel chair and body cast bound Cody who could only move his eyes at the moment. "I guess we can help you get there."
"I'll do it." Beth offered as she started pushing Cody towards the dock of shame with Gwen, Leshawna, and Owen all voicing their goodbyes to the boy.
As Beth pushed Cody towards the dock of shame, meditating on the roof of the Killer Bass cabin. A splash was heard, a result of Beth accidently pushing Cody into the lake, as Dawn's eyes snapped open. "The other team's darkness has grown…"
And with that grim remark comes the end of yet another episode of Total. Drama. Island!
"Ok, other than Cody getting mauled and voted off you guys gotta admit." Rusty stated as everyone got up and stretched out a bit causing a few 'pops' to be heard. "This episode was probably the best freaking one yet!"
"Oh yeah totally." Stella chuckled as memories of seeing Heather getting stung and peed on came to her head. "And it was so cute seeing Lincoln and Dawn's crush on each other! Ugh! When are they just gonna go out and say it already! Shouldn't Dawn know about Lincoln's feelings for her?"
"Maybe." Liam shrugged, not fully knowing the answer. "I mean who knows how far that aura reading thing goes. Buncha freaky witchcraft if you ask me! But I suppose she's at least a good witch."
"I just hope Heather gets the boot soon." Zach stated as everyone instantly agreed with the red head. "Seriously, she's like a cockroach or something."
"Welp, guess we'll all just have to wait and see." Clyde said as he started cleaning things up. "Now remember, you guys said you were gonna help me clean up." And so everyone did. The episode fresh on their minds as they cleaned up after themselves per the request of Clyde's dads as many questions went through their minds. But the only way to answer them would be to wait and watch more episodes of Total. Drama. Island!