Part 4: Final Goodbye and a New Beginning
Syrus
After sitting in my room for a while, I finally pulled myself together. I couldn't let my emotions take over, not today. I had plans, and I wasn't going to let anything ruin them. I took a long shower, letting the warm water calm me down. When I stepped out, I took my time picking out clothes—something comfortable but fitting for the day ahead. Once I was dressed and ready, I took a deep breath before stepping out of my room. The moment I did, I felt Vale's eyes on me. He was staring—his gaze sharp and unreadable, like he was trying to figure something out. I quickly looked away, pretending not to notice. Avoiding him was the best thing I could do right now, even though I knew it wouldn't be easy.
I tried to walk past him, heading straight for the door. But before I could, his hand suddenly reached out and grabbed my wrist. "Syrus," he said softly, his voice laced with uncertainty. "Did I do something wrong?" I froze for a second.
Did he really not know? Or was he just pretending? For a moment, I thought about answering him, about telling him exactly how I felt. But I knew it wouldn't change anything. It would just bring back more pain, more confusion. And I couldn't handle that. Not now. So instead, I sighed, pried my wrist from his grasp, and walked away without a word.
Just as I reached for the door handle, Vale suddenly grabbed me and pushed me back against the door. His movements weren't rough, but they were firm—desperate, even. His grip on my wrist tightened, and I could feel the heat of his body so close to mine. His eyes, filled with a mixture of sadness and frustration, searched my face as if looking for something—an answer, maybe. But I refused to meet his gaze.
I turned my head away. I didn't want to do this. Not again. I was exhausted.
"Syrus," he called, his voice softer now, carrying a hint of something I hadn't heard from him in a long time—affection. If this had been in the past, my heart would have raced. I would have felt warmth spread through me, and maybe I would have cried from happiness. But not anymore. Now, there was nothing. Just emptiness.
Maybe it was because I had already given up—on him, on us, on everything we used to be. I pressed my hands against his chest, trying to push him away, but he didn't budge. He was too strong, and no matter how much I wanted to escape this moment, I couldn't.
Then, out of nowhere, he moved closer. His head rested against the side of my neck, his breath warm against my skin. I froze, my body refusing to move. And then I heard it. A whisper, barely audible, but clear enough to reach me. "I still love you."
I didn't react. I didn't even flinch. The words, which once would have meant everything, felt meaningless now. I had no response, no emotions left to give. I simply let out a quiet sigh and pushed against him again, this time with a little more force. "Could you please move aside?" I said calmly, my voice void of emotion. There was nothing more to say.
The moment those words left my mouth, Vale froze. His body stiffened, and I could feel the rapid beat of his heart. His eyes, once filled with determination, now reflected something else—pain. A pain I had just caused.
This was exactly why I wanted to avoid him. No matter what we did, no matter what we said, we only ended up hurting each other even more.
Taking advantage of his moment of hesitation, I finally pulled myself free from his grip. Without another word, I stepped past him, leaving him standing there by the door—silent, motionless, and completely dumbfounded.
The moment I stepped outside, I immediately spotted James. He was leaning casually against his car, looking effortlessly handsome, as always. The way the evening light hit his face only made it more noticeable.
As soon as he saw me, he pushed off the car and walked toward me with a relaxed smile. "Hello."
I returned his smile, feeling a small sense of relief at his presence. "Hey," I greeted back before glancing at the car. "Shall we go?"
James nodded with a small smile before stepping forward to open the car door for me. His gestures were always smooth, effortless, like he had done this a thousand times before.
"Tonight's meal is going to be great," he said confidently as he slid into the driver's seat. "You can expect nothing less."
I chuckled at his enthusiasm, shaking my head slightly. "I'll hold you to that."
With that, we drove off. The city lights blurred past us, casting a warm glow over the quiet streets. But just as we turned the corner, my eyes caught sight of someone stepping out of the building—Vale. He stood there, looking in our direction, but I refused to acknowledge him. I didn't let my gaze linger, didn't let any emotion show. Instead, I simply looked ahead, pretending he wasn't there. It was better that way.
We ended up at a restaurant near the beach—the same one where we had met last time. I hadn't expected him to bring me here, and the surprise caught me off guard. The place was cozy, with soft lighting and the distant sound of waves crashing against the shore. It should have been relaxing.
We talked a lot while eating, but no matter how good the food looked, I barely had an appetite. My mind was too clouded with everything that had happened today. The exhaustion weighed on me, making it hard to even pretend to enjoy the moment.
James must have noticed. He set his fork down and looked at me with concern. "Is everything alright, Syrus?"
I forced a small, half-hearted smile. "I'm just tired," I replied.
For a moment, neither of us said anything. The quiet between us wasn't awkward, just filled with unspoken thoughts. Then, as if reading my mind, James spoke again. "Is it because of that guy from earlier?"
I sighed. He was perceptive as always. There was no point in denying it.
Slowly, I explained everything to him—the past, the present, the mess that was still lingering between me and Vale. James listened carefully, nodding every now and then, never interrupting. When I finally finished, I expected him to say something, maybe offer advice.
Instead, he stood up. Before I could react, he gently pulled me into a hug. It was warm, comforting, and unexpectedly sweet. I felt myself relax, just a little, as if a small weight had been lifted. Even if it didn't erase everything, at least for now, it made me feel a little better.
After dinner, we decided to stay by the beach for a while. The air was cool, carrying the scent of salt and sea, and the sound of waves gently crashing against the shore filled the silence between us. It was peaceful—almost enough to make me forget about everything weighing on my mind.
James sat beside me on the sand, his gaze fixed on the ocean. After a long moment, he sighed. "You know, sometimes I get envious of the people around me," he admitted, his voice quiet but thoughtful.
I turned to him, a little surprised. "Really? How so?"
He let out a small chuckle, but there was something wistful about it. "It's just that... my friends have already found that one person—the one they know they'll spend their lives with. Meanwhile, here I am, still searching, still hoping for something real. Isn't that kind of pathetic?"
I frowned, shaking my head. "Of course not." My voice came out sharper than I intended, but I didn't care. "You're human. Wishing for someone who truly loves you isn't pathetic at all. Everyone wants that, whether they admit it or not."
James looked at me, surprised by my sudden conviction. For a moment, we just sat there, the waves filling the space between us.
James chuckled, ruffling my hair with a teasing grin. "You're already an expert, aren't you?" I felt my face heat up in embarrassment. "I'm not—"
"But thank you," he said suddenly, his tone softer now. His gaze held something deeper, something vulnerable. "Hearing that from you... it makes me feel like I can keep going. Like I can keep waiting for the right person—the one who will love me for real." He smiled, and for a moment, I felt warmth in his words.
I was about to respond when, out of nowhere, a firm hand grabbed mine. "Let's go home," a familiar voice said, laced with anger.
I turned sharply. Vale stood there, his expression dark, his grip tight around my wrist. My brows furrowed as I yanked my hand away. "Why are you here?" I demanded, my voice colder than I expected.
Vale didn't answer right away. Instead, he took a small step closer and whispered, his voice calm but strained, "Let's talk, Sy. Please, let's go home." Something in his tone made me pause. Then I saw it—his eyes glistening under the dim beach lights, unshed tears threatening to fall. Vale was crying. And for a brief second, I didn't know what to feel.
James stood up, brushing the sand off his clothes. "I'll go now," he said casually.
I reached out instinctively, about to stop him, but he turned back with a small smile. "You should clear things up with him, right?" I hesitated. My lips parted to say something—anything—but no words came out. All I could do was watch as he walked away, his figure slowly disappearing into the distance.
I sighed, turning my gaze back to Vale, who was still standing there, waiting. Without another word, I followed him home. Once inside, I dropped onto the couch, exhausted. My eyes flickered to the teddy bear sitting beside me, its presence feeling heavier than before.
Vale sat down too, though he left a noticeable gap between us. The silence stretched between us, thick and suffocating. I didn't speak. I just waited. Finally, he broke the silence. "I'm sorry, Sy." His voice was quiet, almost fragile. "I'm such a jerk for hurting you. I'm so sorry."
I didn't look at him. I just stared at the floor, unsure of what to feel anymore. Those words—his apology, his regret—were what I had longed to hear for years. But now that they were finally here, I didn't know what to feel.
"I know you might not accept it," Vale continued, his voice low and unsteady, "but I need to tell you my reason." I let out a slow sigh, gripping my hands together as I fought back the tears that threatened to spill.
"I really love you, Sy," he said, his voice filled with an aching sincerity. "That love never changed. I've always loved you. But... being with you suddenly felt so hard." I swallowed, my throat tight, but I stayed silent, letting him speak.
"I know it's pathetic, but... seeing you up there while I was just someone down here—it was hard." He let out a shaky breath. "I never blamed you for that. In fact, I was so proud of you. You were independent, doing the things you love, chasing your dreams. But the more I watched you, the more envious I felt. I wished I was like you. I wished we were on the same level. I wished I had done something—anything—that you could be proud of." Vale clenched his fists, his knuckles turning white. "But in the end, all I did was push you away. The choices I made, the things I did... they only hurt you." His words hung heavy in the air, and for a long moment.
Vale stood up, then slowly knelt in front of me. His hands trembled as he reached out slightly, hesitating, like he was afraid to touch me. His cheeks were already wet with tears, his eyes filled with desperation and sorrow.
"I know... I have no right to ask," his voice cracked as he spoke. "But please... come back to me." I swallowed hard, my chest tightening at the sight of him like this.
"Please, Sy," he continued, his voice barely above a whisper. "Give me a chance to make things right. I love you." His lips trembled as more tears fell. "I love you so much." He lowered his head, his shoulders shaking. The weight of his words settled heavily between us. I could only sit there, frozen, as everything I thought I had let go of came rushing back all at once.
In the end, I couldn't hold it in any longer. The tears I had been trying so hard to suppress suddenly spilled over, rushing down my face. My hands trembled as I reached out and held Vale's.
"You should have told me," I choked out, my voice shaking. "You should have just said how you felt. I would have understood. I could have tried to help, to support you more, to be there for you." My grip on his hands tightened as I let everything out. "But instead, you ran away. Every time I asked you what was wrong, you avoided it. You kept changing the subject, pretending everything was fine when it wasn't."
Vale lowered his head, silent tears falling onto our joined hands.
"I gave you everything, Vale. Every piece of love I had, I gave it all to you." My voice cracked, raw with pain. "But you never saw it. You never realized that I was holding on as tightly as I could." I inhaled sharply, struggling to breathe past the ache in my chest. "Now... there's nothing left. I have nothing left to give, Vale. Nothing."
A deep silence settled between us, broken only by the sound of his quiet sobs. Then, finally, I said the words I had been dreading. The final goodbye. "I don't think I can be with you right now."
Vale remained on his knees, his shoulders shaking, his face wet with tears. For a moment, he didn't say anything. Then, his lips parted, and he whispered, "I guess... this is my karma." He let out a weak, bitter chuckle. "For all the love you gave me... I should have cherished it. I should have just loved you the way you deserved." Slowly, he stood up, his legs unsteady.
"I'm sorry, Vale," I murmured, my heart breaking all over again. He looked at me with a sad smile, fresh tears still rolling down his cheeks. "I understand, Sy," he said softly. "I really do."
He turned away, taking a shaky breath before adding, "I'll come back someday. And when I do, I hope... it won't be too late for us to start over." And with that, he left. I didn't stop him.
He had already packed his things. He had already made up his mind to move out. It was as if... he knew how this would end all along. But even so, he still tried.
**********
Two years had passed, but the memory of that day still lingered in my mind like a heavy weight I couldn't shake. I still loved Vale, that much was clear. It was the realization that hit me after all these years apart. We never contacted each other, even though I still had his number saved and he still had mine, we both kept our distance. It was almost like we were stuck in time, both too afraid or too proud to reach out.
Sometimes, I found myself wondering—what if I had given him a chance back then? Would things have been different? Could we have been happy together? But it was pointless to dwell on the past now. No matter how much I thought about it, it wouldn't change anything.
It was one of those days when I found myself back at the beach, the place I always went to clear my head. The sound of the waves crashing on the shore, the salty breeze, it all seemed so familiar and soothing. I sat there, lost in my thoughts, wondering when I would finally get my chance at happiness.
"When will the waves of fortune wash over me?" I thought to myself. I stood up, ready to leave, when I heard someone call my name.
"Syrus." My heart skipped a beat. I turned around and saw him—Vale. He looked different, but it was still him. The same eyes, the same smile, just... changed. There was a new aura about him, something softer, but more confident.
I smiled, trying to keep the emotions from overwhelming me. "It's been a while." I slowly walked toward him, not sure if I was dreaming.
Then, Vale reached behind him and pulled out a bouquet of flowers. "It really has been," he said, his voice gentle. Without thinking, I grabbed his arms and pulled him into a tight hug. The warmth of his embrace felt so familiar, so right. It was the only thing I needed in that moment. I closed my eyes, feeling his presence against me, as if everything that had happened in the past two years had led me right back to this.
The End