VANESSA BELMONT
In my other life, Nathan posed the honeymoon question. He told me he would be taking Fiona to Italy. Not that we got as far as going on a honeymoon. Fiona had made sure of that.
Truthfully, I had smothered Nathan. He was always going to belong to Fiona, but I pushed him right into her arms by holding on to him so tightly he couldn't breathe. In the process, I also suffocated myself.
"If this marriage proceeds, I will honor my obligations as your wife. I will schmooze business partners, host parties, attend events, serve on committees, and do everything necessary to make you shine in your CEO position." I met his gaze, and felt my pulse jump. He was so good-looking. He had other qualities, of course, but man-oh-man he was nice to look at. Get over it, Vanessa. He will never be yours.
"Look, we've approached marriage as a business transaction. Maybe we should approach it as a ... relationship."
"A relationship? Oh! Right. Look, the sex thing is something we can work out. Schedule it on Saturdays or whatever." I lifted three fingers. "I won't cheat. Even if we don't love each other, I will honor and respect you."
"I don't want to schedule sex."
"You ... don't? So, no sex? We agreed to have kids. You want us to do IVF or something?"
He put his arm around my waist and pulled me into his embrace. He leaned down and whispered, "No, I want to do you."
I felt my stomach flutter. What was happening here? Why was Nathan so interested in me? I pushed at his chest, but he refused to let me go.
I sighed. "In the past, I've been selfish and needy. I lacked confidence, and that was a me problem. I shouldn't have burdened you with my baggage. I'm sorry."
He stared at me, but said nothing. I couldn't interpret his expression, and it made me nervous.
"To be clear, I'm expressing regret for the things I actually did, not the things Fiona has accused me of doing. So, you don't have to be considerate of my feelings or make me believe you're attracted to me. We don't have to go that far for our business marriage, okay? I'm certainly not going to make you spend two weeks in Italy with me."
"We don't have to go to Italy."
"We're not going anywhere together. Take Fiona to the land of sun and wine. I will be in a snowy paradise, lazing about in a cozy cabin in Canada. I will read books and drink hot cocoa and nap by the fire. Oh, by the way, does Fiona know you're here?"
"I told her I planned to spend the afternoon with you."
"You did? Well, I guess it's going to be a hospital day. Do you have games on your phone? At least you won't be bored while you're waiting for all the tests."
"What are you talking about?"
I patted his arm, though I wasn't exactly sympathetic. "How long since her last collapse?" I snapped my fingers. "Right. A couple weeks ago. The Scottsdale get-together. She felt so weak, she couldn't stand. You left with her halfway through the meal, which was a shame. The seafood pasta was excellent."
"You shouldn't blame her."
"Blame her for what? Your decisions?" I could tell from his expression he wanted to argue, so I lifted my hand in a "stop" gesture. "If we get married, I'll honor my contractual obligations for the benefits of our families and businesses. I know you'll be discreet with Fiona."
But Fiona wouldn't. In the next six months, she would create scandal after scandal, and make Nathan and his parents believe my unreasonable jealousy had driven me to extremes. But even with all that, canceling the marriage was out of the question. Fiona might be able to win against me, but she couldn't compete with the financial advantages our marital union brought our corporate families.
In this reborn life, I wouldn't give Fiona chance to frame me. I knew her moves and I would counter them all. I would get my revenge, come hell or high water.
Nathan's cell phone trilled and he pulled it out of his front pants pocket. "Fiona? Which hospital?" His gaze snagged mine. "Okay. I'll be there soon."
"Tell Fiona I said hi." I turned to walk away, but Nathan grasped my shoulder and spun me around.
"How did you know Fiona would end up in the emergency room today?"
"Aren't you a genius or something? President of one the world's largest corporations? Smarter than the average bear?"
"Vanessa."
Ugh. Why didn't he find dealing with Fiona exhausting? She was an energy-sucking vampire. "There's a pattern to her so-called illness, Nathan. Anytime she feels like she's lost your attention, she finds a way to draw you back to her side."
His expression hardened. Ah. There he was. The real Nathan. The one who protected Fiona and thought of me as the enemy. Given the choice between saving me or her, he chose her.
In this life, I would choose myself.
Because no one else would.
"Consider us a professional partnership and leave emotions out of our interactions." I smiled even though my heart ached. Saying the opposite of how I felt hurt like a sucking chest wound. But what could I do? Fiona had already won the game. Just like in my last life, Nathan was still catering to her under the guise of "helping."
Helping. How many times had he used that excuse before? How many times had I swallowed my pride and let him walk away from me—from us—because Fiona supposedly needed him more? And how could I, the contract marriage partner, complain about his attention to another woman?
I had foolishly confessed my feelings to Nathan after we'd signed the contracts six months ago. Naively, I thought we could give each other the chance to fall in love. Well, him. I was already in love with him and had been since college.
But now? I knew nothing I did would matter to him.