Everything was calm.
Too calm.
I'd just opened the system menu to check Fn+1 when the wind died. Birds stopped chirping. Even the leaves froze mid-rustle, like the whole world hit pause.
Akai's voice didn't echo, it invaded. And then…
Snap.
The world warped around me. The forest vanished in a blink, and I was standing in a colorless void.
The mindscape. A space where any character that shared a body with someone else had.
'Looks like I'm back to my true form.' I thought, looking at my body that had returned to how it was when I was on Earth.
Gray mist coiled at my feet, shadows twisting into vague memories. I looked around, deadpan.
"Oh. Looks like my suppression couldn't hold him back. And we're doing this again."
There he was. Akai. Standing across from me, ten feet away, his fists clenched, chest rising and falling like he'd just sprinted through hell. His eyes were red-rimmed, bloodshot. He wasn't just angry, he was Pained.
"You dragged me into this?" I asked flatly. "You could've just yelled like you always do."
"I needed you to see me," he snapped. "To look at me, not just hear my voice like some glitchy afterthought in your skull."
"Ah, yes, I can hear you. You don't need to yell"
I sighed. "Alright. I'm looking at you. So?"
That broke something in him.
"You—" He surged forward, fist swinging for my face.
I didn't flinch.
The punch slammed into my cheek. Hard. My head jerked slightly to the side. My feet didn't move.
I turned back to him, still expressionless.
"Feel better?"
He snarled and threw another punch.
I blocked it.
"You're pissed," I said. "I get it."
Akai leapt back and unleashed a flurry of strikes, faster now. I parried, stepped to the side, and kept my stance tight. I didn't counterattack.
"You're not mad at me," I said calmly, as he kept swinging. "You're mad at what I let happen. And you're right. I let them die for a reason."
"What's your great reason then, asshole? Stop acting like you're above this!" he screamed, slamming a fist into my chest.
I barely budged. Since this was the mental space, what was being portrayed was out true form, my 14-year old trained physique would obviously overpower a 10-year old's punches.
"You watched our town burn. You let my parents die! You let the only place that ever gave me peace become a horror scene because you were too scared to change your story!"
"...Yeah," I said. "I did."
He froze.
"No excuses?" he asked, voice cracking.
I shook my head slowly. "What's the point? If I dragged both your parents and your siblings, Hao Jun still would have chased them because they have high mana reserves, and eventually, they would have gotten you"
"You think standing there with a blank face makes you strong?"
"No. It's just efficient."
That did it.
He tackled me. We both went down hard, his fist pounding into my ribs again and again. It hurt—but I didn't react.
Not physically. Not vocally.
Not outwardly.
"You don't even care, do you?!" he shouted, his voice breaking. "You're just moving forward like it's a mission. Like our deaths were a tutorial level! Why didn't you command Rael to fight and beat that person that killed my parents, then?"
"All the things you're yapping about don't even make any sense, Do you think I wouldn't have done that if I could? If Rael and Hao Jun were to fight there, this planet would have veered off course. Be reasonable."
His fists slowed.
His fist connected with my face.
Then another.
Then he stopped.
I laid there, staring at the gray sky above. My lips were still. My face still unreadable.
But inside?
Every word stuck like glass.
I'd felt the weight of it for weeks. The fact that I ruined a kid's life and created another orphan… Well, three more.
I hadn't forgotten.
I just didn't have time to fall apart.
"You think you're the only one hurting," I said finally, voice low. "You think because I didn't cry, I didn't care."
I sat up, brushing dust off my shirt.
"But I see them every night. I hear that horn. I see that fucking truck. And then I see Nez's smile right before everything went to hell. And I think: 'What if I had five more minutes? Ten?' Nothing would have changed anyways."
Akai looked down.
"I wake up with my stomach in knots," I said. "But I keep moving. Because if I stop, I fall apart. And if I fall apart… more people die."
I stood up.
"Noel and Nez are still out there. I'm gonna get stronger. Not to fix the past. But to protect what's left. There's more to protect in the future anyways."
"You didn't even try to save the rest," he whispered.
" They're your siblings, not mine. I only feel sad because I can relate to them. I saved who I could. " I met his eyes. "If that makes me a coward, fine."
He stared at me for a long time.
Then his hands curled into fists again. He looked like he wanted to scream—wanted me to fight him, to break, to bleed something real.
But I gave him nothing.
Because I couldn't afford to.
"You're stone," he whispered. "You really are."
I answered.
"No, I'm the infernal that took over your body."
The gray mist began to lift. The mental space cracked at the edges.
"At this point, we both know that's a lie."
Akai turned away.
"I'll try to forgive you," he said.
"I'm not asking you to."
And then I was back.
Sitting in the real world, in the same position, with the same stillness.
Rael hadn't noticed a thing.
But my hands were shaking.
Just a little.
Not enough to be seen.