Harry James Potter woke on his eleventh birthday to see deep chocolate brown eyes gazing at him, "I'd think you'd be tired of staring."
"I like you without glasses," she said, running her hand through his hair, "and I will never tire of staring at you. Just like you won't tire of looking at me."
He yawned and sat up, "I guess that's true. So what were you thinking about?"
She smiled and pulled him back down onto the bed, resting her head on his chest, "I was thinking about how much better things are this time. All the Death Eaters were arrested, charged, sentenced to death," she sighed, "we couldn't even manage that after you killed Voldemort the last time."
Harry chuckled, "That's depressing, isn't it? Dad and Sirius got werewolves to be equal citizens too. In the other timeline Muggleborns became second class citizens and could even be the property of purebloods while 'half-breeds' were kicked out of the country or hunted down like wild dogs." Hermione shivered at the memories and Harry wrapped his arms around her comfortingly. "I'm really, really glad you figured out how to make that super-powered time turner."
"You helped."
"Not much," he rubbed her back with one hand, "I really was a slacker."
"You weren't so much a slacker as you had zero self-confidence and didn't think you were smart," Harry always admired how Hermione refused to let him put himself down. "You're much better at school this time."
"Well thank you my love," he glanced at the clock, "I guess we should go downstairs. So far each birthday has been much improved over the last time. Although," he admitted, "your presence in our bed has much to do with that."
"You get your Hogwarts letter today."
"And we have to make a decision," he nodded. "Your thoughts?"
"I thought we'd talk about it with the family today. I'll keep my thoughts to myself until then."
Harry turned in the bed and kissed her, "I can't wait until we're old enough to at least do something in bed."
She nodded and snuggled into him, "Happy birthday my love."
"Thank you my wife."
They were sitting down to breakfast with both sets of parents and Remus and Sirius when the owl came. Harry sighed and opened it, reading the letter with Hermione though they both knew what it said. "Have you two made your decision yet?" Emma asked.
"Well we both were ready to take our NEWTs before," Hermione began.
"And Hogwarts doesn't offer advanced studies for courses. If you're ahead of the class then you're simply ahead of the class," Harry added.
"There's nothing we haven't already learned and History of Magic is a waste of time with Binns."
"Slughorn isn't much better than Snape, especially once he learns that I'm Harry Potter. Bastard will just want to add me to his 'collection' like last time."
"The Weasleys would be there and we still haven't forgiven them," Hermione cut in.
Harry finished, "Plus we'd have to sleep apart."
"We really couldn't handle that," Hermione nodded.
"And if anyone harasses my Hermione they'll be paying for their stupidity," Harry was rewarded with a kiss for that statement.
"What about your friends?" James asked.
"Neville and Susan would be very upset if you weren't on the train with them," Lily added.
Harry sighed, "Mum, Dad, we've both thought about this and come up with our own conclusions independently. There's just no point in us attending Hogwarts. We're so far ahead of the curriculum and really I'd only be gawked at as the boy of the couple who defeated the Dark Lord."
"Besides, people would be very curious as to why we're so far ahead of everyone else. Those are questions we desperately don't want asked." Hermione squeezed her husband's hand.
"If that's what you two want then that's what we'll do."
"It is," Harry said, looking at his wife for confirmation.
Hermione smiled at him, "We could do independent study or go to another school overseas. Australia's school looks interesting."
Lily looked at James as they set the kids loose in the amusement park, "They don't want to go because of Dumbledore."
"I think that's a big reason," he nodded, "but I can't fault them. Snape knew enough to strip him from the Wizengamot and ICW but he somehow managed to retain the title of headmaster. I don't want them anywhere near that old coot."
She shook her head, "I wish we could have taken him down James. The man is as slippery as an eel. And I don't trust him near our boy or Neville."
"We can talk to Frank, Alice, Xeno, Selene, and Amelia tonight and see if they'd be interested in either independent study or studying abroad. We could get a house in whatever country they want to study in and you and Emma could stay there with them. You can both work from anywhere."
"True," Lily nodded. "I still can't believe you made Dan the fourth Marauder. Or that Emma let you."
James laughed, "The moment I met them I liked them. And without the Grangers, GP Electric wouldn't have gone anywhere."
As was customary, Lily groaned at the name. Dan and James had thought it up one night as the women were going over more important things like finances for the future family business. Harry and Hermione had been five at the time and had both rolled their eyes at their fathers' antics. Emma and Lily had agreed with them. "Still, we've made some major changes," Lily smiled. "Based on what they've told us our world is a much better place than it would have been."
"Didn't take much to improve on that version," James slid his arm around his wife. The thought of his daughter-in-law being handed over to a pureblood just because she was a Muggleborn had given him nightmares when the kids had told them about it. The relief that their marriage when they were sixteen had prevented the law affecting them was marginal. James had worked hard to make sure that that would never happen again. He and Lily looked at Hermione as though she was their own daughter, just as he knew Dan and Emma saw Harry as their son. Anyone trying that again would find James Potter at their door. Presuming he got there before Lily tore them to pieces, anyway.
"We're going on the log ride after lunch," Harry said.
"You just want to see Hermione in a wet t-shirt," Susan teased.
Harry's beet red face was all the confirmation the others needed and they laughed, though Hermione leaned close to whisper, "While I appreciate the sentiment, love, they're nowhere near as big as they were the last time you played with them."
"I know but it's been ten years," he pouted. "I'm starting to get really frustrated."
Hermione smiled before whispering into his ear, "Then you're going to love my present to you when I give it to you tonight."
Harry swallowed hard. Hermione squeezed his hand and pulled him along to the next ride. Harry smiled. In the last timeline the best of his birthdays were the ones when he and Hermione shared a bed. It was just the two of them, but Hermione would make a cake for him and they'd make love. Now his birthdays were better than ever. He had friends, parents, and of course Hermione. The one negative was outweighed by all the good. Neville and Luna were happier, healthier, and far more confident than they had been before. Susan, who had always been quiet and slightly sad before, was now outspoken and happy.
While the day was fun and easygoing, Harry and Hermione found themselves the subject of an interrogation on the car ride back home that afternoon. "Are you two going to Hogwarts or not?"
Hermione shook her head, "We're not."
The other three looked down and Harry spoke, "But our parents are going to talk to yours about maybe all five of us going abroad or studying independently. Hermione and I can help tutor you plus we can stay the hell away from Dumbledore."
Immediately all three lit up. Their friends hadn't forgotten them. Luna was possibly the most excited. She couldn't go to Hogwarts when they did because her birthday was in late September, but if they studied independently then she could participate with them and not be left behind. Harry and Hermione talked about their ideas, the other three listening eagerly.
Back at the Potter house where Harry's birthday dinner was taking place Hermione looked up at the frying pan that James had hung on the wall, a plaque below it stating the date Emma had whacked Dumbledore with it. "You know it's never coming down," Harry said, wrapping his arms around her waist.
"I rather like it," she said.
He chuckled before growing serious, "Do you really think we should try to take Dumbledore down?"
She turned to face him, "Harry the Death Eaters finally got punished but Dumbledore got away. We can't let him get away with it. Do you honestly think he isn't plotting against you?"
Harry's head shook in the negative, "I'm sure he is but I don't think we have anything on him we can use. Unless we kill him outright I don't know what we could do."
Hermione tilted her head in thought. "What if we set him up?"
The kiss he gave her provided that answer. "Brilliant! We know he's coming after me, we know he thinks Voldemort will turn up, we even know he's going to use the stone as bait."
Hermione nodded, "Now no doubt he's keeping a low profile but what if his hand is forced?"
The Harry of the old timeline couldn't keep up with Hermione's mind, but this time he knew where she was going, "You want us to make it appear that Voldemort is coming back?"
"Who is more capable of that feat than us?"
Harry laughed. You couldn't argue with that. They knew more about Voldemort than even Dumbledore did. "Well then I think you're planning on driving Dumbledore insane."
"And it will be wicked, especially since he'll presume it's Voldemort."
"And no one will believe him. Even his greatest followers will see the truth. A manipulative egomaniac gets the utter tear-down that he should have had the first time. I still wish I knew how he kept the position of headmaster though; I wouldn't want him anywhere near children."
Hermione nodded in understanding, "Do you think he bound Fawkes to him?"
Harry tilted his head to the side, "I think he could have. In fact I wouldn't put it past him if he did. But he does tend to toe the line between light and dark, rather than just leap across like Voldemort."
"Still most of his actions…"
"Hermione, I think Dumbledore's biggest problem is similar to con artists and psychics. They start to believe their own bullshit. He justifies every crime and transgression to himself as he knows best. And the wizards and witches of Britain have for a long time praised him and treated him as though he's infallible. He really believes he is flawless. Anyone who says otherwise is evil or stupid." Hermione couldn't argue that. Emma called them in for dinner and they walked in together arm in arm.
After an enjoyable evening with friends and family they finally retired to their room. Harry sat down on the bed and watched Hermione pull out a notebook as she sat at their desk. "Any ideas?"
"I was thinking we could create a daydream potion and douse those infernal lemon drops he always eats in them. He'd suddenly see Voldemort instead of the person he was looking at," Hermione smiled up at him, "What do you think?"
"That sounds brilliant," he pulled his shirt over his head and tossed it into the hamper, "Do you know how Fred and George did it?"
"It's easy to figure out," Hermione said, "George gave me one once. I always did like him."
"Hopefully not as much as you like me."
"I had a crush on him briefly," Hermione admitted, "but not as strong as the feelings I have always had for you."
Harry smiled and slid off his pants. "So what exactly is my present from you?"
Hermione finished writing something down before she got up and walked over to him, wrapping her arms around his neck, "Harry we have to wait for certain things. However there's one thing that should ease that waiting for you." She reached under their mattress and pulled out something that looked curiously like a homework planner. Harry opened it to unveil images of his wife when she was eighteen in various stages of undress. He turned the pages to see the animated pictures doing quite a bit. Once Harry had pulled his eyes away from Hermione in the Xena outfit with a whip in her hand his wife smiled and kissed him, "I figured this was something that wouldn't arouse suspicion. I used the pensieve and took pictures of my memories."
"This is amazing, love. This will certainly help." She undressed and got ready for bed, Harry looking through the book and the different pictures she'd put in it. "Hermione how much do you miss it?"
"Not as much as I thought I might at first," she admitted, "but I'm starting to feel the strain much more now. You?"
"I miss the intimacy. We snuggle now and we kiss and hug and whatnot but…well it's just not a replacement for our physical relationship."
Hermione slid into bed and let him join her, "I don't want our oral experiences to begin until we both can experience them."
"It's not fair to you," he mumbled.
"Then expect to make it up to me," she kissed him, "I love you."
"I love you too," he felt her hand slide gently over his bare chest, "I'm not as built as I was."
"Do you hear me complaining?"
"No I guess not," he admitted. "I know we'll get those bodies back. I just don't like the waiting."
"You always were impatient," she teased.
Deciding to change the topic Harry spoke, "Do you remember that moment in Fourth Year when Ron made the sudden and astounding revelation that you're a girl?" Hermione smiled in spite of her anger at the redhead and nodded. Harry continued, "Part of me was still worried you might leave me and choose him or someone else. I was silently praying and thanking every deity I've ever heard about that we were left alone for our 'training' sessions in which we snogged while he was busy moping that someone was trying to kill me and not him."
"Not what he was moping about exactly," Hermione interrupted.
Harry waved his hand dismissively, "Regardless, when Ron opened his stupid fat mouth I finally saw what you'd seen. Ron was a jealous, controlling, manipulative git. Just like his sister he saw me as a bank account and someone to be used."
Hermione shifted to straddle him, "What is your point, Harry love?"
Two hands moved over her thighs and she smiled. Harry's touch was very much missed on her end. "My point is that if it weren't for the insufferable prat's inability to keep his mouth shut I wouldn't have finally seen what you'd tried to tell me. I still relish having punched him that night."
"I do enjoy that memory too," Hermione admitted. "I still don't get why you're telling me that story now when we're in bed and I'm straddling you." Harry blushed and she smiled, "My very favorite memory from that timeline is the look on your face when I asked you to be my boyfriend."
"Of all the ways I imagined or fantasized you becoming my girlfriend, none of them were you asking me out," he said, sitting up to kiss her. "You know, we made a bet before we killed Voldemort."
"We did," she nodded.
"We both see ourselves as still married; have since we were very small. So who won the bet?"
"No one did. Our bet presumed we wouldn't remember being a couple," she answered, pushing him down onto the bed and deepening the kiss. "Now, birthday boy, you're one birthday away from hopefully finally being able to do more than just snog. Let's enjoy that." Harry found himself silenced in one of the best ways she could silence him, her mouth on his.
Lily filled out the Hogwarts form along with Emma, "You know the kids are doing it again."
"Plotting something and not telling us or asking for help?" James asked as he quickly cleaned up the kitchen using his wand.
"Yes," Lily answered, looking over the Hogwarts letters she made sure they were marked properly. She wished she could see the old bastard's face when he found out that Harry wouldn't be returning to school. "What do you think they're planning?"
"Probably something big that is life changing. That's their usual modus operandi," James sighed, "I'd hope by now they'd trust us."
"They do trust you," Emma pointed out, "they left the biggest things in your hands and you handled it well."
"They both like having a plan before asking for help anyway," Dan cut in.
James nodded. "That's true, I suppose."
Hermione woke the next morning with a smile. Harry ran his hand over her chest, "I love you."
"I love you too," she sighed.
"I really, really like this idea."
"We have to decide what to do with the Weasleys though."
Harry licked his lips, "Do you want to kill them all or just some of them? Or we could set them up."
"You'd think we'd have figured more out before now." Hermione glanced at the clock, "Let's get up love. They have to know what we're doing."
"Well they probably know we're plotting something," Harry turned to kiss her, "you're beautiful."
"Changing the topic." His wink had her rolling her eyes, "Harry I'm well aware of your attempts to distract me and since you can't use sex to do it you're going with plan B."
"Kissing you senseless? Well if my lady insists," he grinned.
"She does," Hermione pulled him to her, her hand digging into his hair as their lips met. "Good distraction."
"I'm a master," he mumbled.
Breakfast had Harry and Hermione being given looks, although Hermione assumed it had to do with the love bites on their necks. She was surprised when Lily asked, "What are you two planning?"
Harry and Hermione were very skilled at having a conversation by merely looking or glancing at one another. They proceeded to have one before Hermione spoke, "We're going to take out Dumbledore."
The casualness of her statement and the way she shrugged had James and Lily staring at them both, wide-eyed. Harry elaborated, "We're pranking him into insanity."
James tried not to laugh. He really, really did. But the mere thought of driving the old masterful manipulator insane combined with the casualness and calmness of both kids, as though they were describing a homework assignment, was too appealing and hilarious to keep his mouth shut. He fell off his chair laughing hysterically while Lily struggled to keep her expression neutral. "And how do you plan on pranking him?"
Harry wandlessly summoned the notebook from their room, "We have a list."
"We worked on it last night and this morning," Hermione added.
"I think that means the list is incredibly long," Lily said.
James managed to compose himself enough to speak, "How are you going to prank him if you don't go to Hogwarts?"
"We're going to sneak in when we need to," Hermione answered. "We'll need to borrow the invisibility cloak for that," she added.
Lily shook her head, "I can't wait to hear what you have planned."
Harry grinned, "We're pretty excited about it."