Aurelion hadn't been able to fall asleep, perhaps he hadn't slept at all. Mistress Linnea's blue white light… A controlled, precise, and clear display of power. Roric's changed posture, that sensed raw, suppressed energy… And himself… trapped in this tiny, restricted body, constantly at the mercy of others. "This is not enough. Just observing, knowing is not enough. I must act."
"Wait and grow… Yes. But not passively."
He pushed the bed covers aside. He carefully straightened up, listening to every muscle, every joint. He waited for a few long seconds to ensure the others in the dormitory were sound asleep.
His goal was the secluded corner, untouched by the window light, a spot that drew little attention during the day. When he reached it, he stopped.
He leaned his back against wall. "This body… holds potential. Just like those other brats. Only… locked. The key is discipline and knowledge." One of the rare useful pieces of information from his past life, from that world he loathed, was the basics of human physiology.
He knew. Overexerting a developing body would do more harm than good. Muscles could tear fiber by fiber, bones could mend incorrectly. The goal wasn't strength, but primarily control. To recognize limits and slowly expand them. "Patience… as disgusting a virtue as it is, for now, it's necessary."
He took a deep breath and with slow movements, he stretched his neck, rotated his shoulders. He carefully stretched his arms. With each movement, he gauged the muscles response.
He sat on the floor. Another crumb from his past knowledge. Abdominal muscles were the center of body balance and strength. He lay on his back. He attempted to lift only his head and shoulders off the ground. The first few attempts resulted in nothing but trembling and tensing his neck. "Useless! Move!" On the next try. He hadn't risen, but there was resistance. "This… is a start." He tried to bring his knees to his chest and then lower them.
Then he stood up. He tried to imitate the most basic, low stance he had seen in the courtyard, legs shoulder width apart and knees slightly bent. He wobbled at first, but then managed to stay still for a few seconds. "Balance… The foundation of everything." He slowly raised his hands in front of him, as if guarding against an invisible opponent. "Control…" he whispered to himself.
He repeated these simple movements for several minutes. Each attempt mercilessly exposed his body's current weakness and inadequacy.
A storm of frustration was brewing somewhere inside him. Why were even such simple movements so difficult? This feeling of physical confinement was suffocating him, reminding him of some memories. "Unacceptable!"
But this time, that old, burning emotion didn't turn into a scream. It gave way to a determination. This frustration was not a reason to give up, but a reason to work harder. "Weak. Yes. For now. But this will change. Every damned day, I will mold this lump of flesh into the cast of my will. With patience and discipline… it will learn." His mind cleared. The road was long and difficult, but a start had been made.
His breath had quickened, and fine beads of sweat trickled down his temples. There was a slight fatigue in his muscles, but he was far from exhausted. He hadn't crossed the limit he had set for himself. This was his strategy. Continuous, small but consistent steps.
He cast one last glance around. He returned to his bed as silently as he had come. When he slipped under the covers, the slight weariness in his body contrasted with the determination in his mind. From the outside, he was just a child sleeping like the others. But inside, the wheels of a cold and relentless plan for the future he would shape with his will had begun to turn. And those wheels would never stop again.
The inevitable routine began after the secret efforts of the early morning.
As soon as breakfast was over, Aurelion immediately found Elara. The girl was by her usual spot near the window. The effects of yesterday's events were still on her. Aurelion sat beside her, silent at first.
"Yesterday," he began finally, trying to keep his voice soft. "What Mistress Linnea did… that blue light." Elara nodded. "Did it look like the green light you described?"
Elara thought for a moment. "No… Mother's was… different. Warmer, maybe? And it smelled different, like the forest."
'Different smell… Different feel…' Aurelion noted this difference. "So how did your mother do it? What happened exactly when she touched the deer?"
"She just… placed her hand," Elara said. "And she said something very quietly. I never understood what she said."
"Were they special words?" Aurelion's curiosity became more apparent.
The girl shrugged. "I don't know… Maybe she was just… focusing on something inside? Mother always used to say, "listen to your inside." As if there was a river flowing inside your body…" Her voice began to tremble again.
Listen to your inside… A flowing river… Aurelion was disappointed he couldn't get a concrete answer. This girl's knowledge was too abstract and emotional. Still, the river flowing inside analogy was interesting. Perhaps that thing flowed in a specific way within the body?
Just as he was about to press further, he noticed the girl was about to get upset again. This fragility was annoying, but it was time to back off. Nevertheless, he made one more attempt, hoping for a slightly clearer answer. "So… she just felt it? How can you feel something without knowing how to feel it?"
Elara flinched and lifted her head, her cheeks slightly flushed. "Maybe the intention was important!"
Aurelion's left eyebrow twitched slightly. This sudden and emotional reaction, this defensive attitude… it grated on his nerves. "Control yourself… Not now," he thought quickly. If he wanted information, he shouldn't startle this fragile source.
He immediately changed his demeanor. "Oh, no! I didn't mean it in a bad way," he said quickly, "She definitely did something very… powerful. It was very impressive." He hoped the compliment would work. "I tried it yesterday too, you know? I was curious. I put my hand on the wall, tried to listen to my "river" inside but… I think mine has dried up."
Elara's guard lowered a little. "Maybe," she said in a timid voice. "Maybe your river flows differently? Or maybe it hasn't… awakened yet?"
Flows differently? Hasn't awakened? Aurelion weighed this analogy. River… Flow… Awakening… These abstract concepts were annoying, but perhaps they were true. Maybe there really was something sleeping inside him, something that needed to flow. Was this some kind of inner power? "Maybe you're right," he just mumbled.
He realized he wouldn't learn anything more from Elara. But his mind had already started working "Something flowing inside, sleeping… How to awaken it? How to feel it?" He filed away the idea of an "inner river" and the possibility of "awakening" it in his mind. This was a riddle he had to solve on his own.
The pale afternoon light struck one of the less used, echoing corridors of the orphanage. Aurelion had thrown himself here after the frustrating conversation with Elara. If there really was something inside him that he could control, that he could awaken, it would change everything. He quickly glanced around. He remembered Elara's mother touching the deer. Mistress Linnea had used her hands too. Perhaps contact was important?
He pressed his palm against the cold stone wall. He closed his eyes, trying to focus all his attention inward, on that 'river' sensation Elara had mentioned. He took deep breaths, trying to clear his mind.
"Listen… listen to your inside…" he repeated the words Elara's mother had told her. River? Flow? What was he supposed to feel? A warmth? A tingling? Or some kind of… vibration? He felt nothing. Only his own heartbeat, the flow of blood in his veins, and the coldness of the stone.
Maybe the problem was his inability to focus? He tried some meditation like techniques he remembered from before, controlled his breathing, tried to create an empty space in his mind. Again, to no avail.
Maybe just feeling wasn't enough? Did he need to give some kind of "command"? He whispered silently: "Awaken." Then harsher: "Flow!" Still nothing. "Nonsense! This isn't working!".
He approached it from another angle. "Maybe it's not about feeling, but directing?" Mistress Linnea's light… That bright energy… Aurelion pressed two fingers against the wall, trying to concentrate all his will on those two points. In his mind, he imagined a bright, blue white light flowing from his fingers to the wall.
He forced it. He tried to keep the image vivid with all his mental strength. When he opened his eyes, all he saw were his own frail fingers resting against the wall. "Insufficient… Either I don't have that "river" or I don't know the key." Just as he was about to succumb to despair, he was startled by the quiet but familiar footsteps coming from the other end of the corridor. Mistress Linnea.
The orphanage manager was walking down the corridor, but her gaze was locked directly on the where Aurelion was. Clearly, she wasn't looking for him, she had just encountered this unexpected scene during her routine check. But her eyes… those blue eyes behind the glasses seemed to be assessing the situation instantly.
It was impossible for her not to notice the small child standing alone in this rarely used part of the corridor, facing the wall, clearly just emerging from some sort of intense concentration.
Aurelion froze for a moment. He was caught. Right at his most vulnerable, most frustrated moment. It was too late to run or hide. As Mistress Linnea approached, his mind began to work rapidly. Denial wouldn't work. It was clear she had observed him. Then… he had to turn the situation to his advantage.
Mistress Linnea stood right in front of him. Her eyebrows slightly furrowed. "Aurelion? What are you doing here? Alone."
Aurelion slowly raised his head. He tried to put on the most innocent, most curious expression possible. "I… was just… thinking," he said, his voice sounding a little shaky.
Mistress Linnea raised an eyebrow. "Thinking? So intensely, facing the wall?" She didn't believe him. "What exactly were you thinking about, then?"
Aurelion took a deep breath, blinked and looked at the floor, then back at Mistress Linnea. "Yesterday… What you did in the courtyard… The injured child… That light…" He paused, as if struggling to find the words. "It was very… impressive. The child's pain eased afterwards, didn't it?"
Mistress Linnea was caught off guard by this unexpectedly honest answer from Aurelion. "Yes, Aurelion. It was important to help him." Her tone was now softer, but still cautious.
"I was… trying to understand," He vaguely gestured towards the wall. "I thought maybe I have a similar… ability. Maybe… maybe I can help too someday? So others don't suffer?" The quest for power disguised as an innocent desire to help.
Mistress Linnea's expression changed instantly. "Trying to understand? Aurelion, what exactly were you trying?"
Aurelion didn't back down. "That "feeling"… Elara said it was "like a river"… I tried to listen to my inside. I focused. But… it didn't work. Then you came. I know, you'll be angry again. You'll say "it's dangerous," you'll say "don't do it." But why? Why is it that whenever I want to learn something, I always hit a wall? You test us, you train us… but when I'm curious about something really important, when I ask a question, there's either no answer or I get scolded!" He raised his voice slightly. "You haven't even told me exactly why I'm here, where my family is! And then you ask me why I'm trying to figure things out on my own!" He fixed his eyes on Mistress Linnea, his attitude now clearly accusatory. "What exactly do you want from me? Just to be a good little brat and sit in the corner?"
This last blow had truly shaken Mistress Linnea. The child's logic, trying his own methods because he couldn't access information and then being questioned for it, felt disturbingly accurate. Yes, he was cunning, yes, he had his previous mischiefs… but the fundamental questions he asked and the information vacuum he was in were also a reality.
Mistress Linnea's professional mask had visibly cracked. She took a deep breath. "Aurelion, I'm not angry… But I want you to understand." She leaned forward, trying to get to his eye level. "Some things, especially powers you don't know how to control… are not just dangerous, they can also negatively affect your development. Your body, your mind, are not ready yet. A wrong step can cause you permanent harm. If we set limits, it's to protect you." She reached out, wanting to put her hand on Aurelion's shoulder.
Aurelion quickly pulled back, causing Mistress Linnea's hand to remain in mid air. "Don't touch me!" he said clearly. "Always to protect! But while protecting, you put me in a cage! I'm bored! Always the same things! I want to learn something!" He looked defiantly at Mistress Linnea. "If you don't want me to do those "dangerous" things… Then teach me the safe things! More reading, writing! History! These lands! Tell me. Where is this place? What is the outside world like? Where do I live? Why don't I have a family? Tell me these things! Or I'll find my own way!"
This last outburst was an open bargain. Mistress Linnea hesitated for a moment, inwardly tipping her hat to this tiny Elf's intelligence and manipulative ability. Constantly blocking him, clearly, wasn't working. Perhaps guiding this uncontrollable curiosity to a safe harbor was the best course of action. And the questions he asked… Every child had a right to know these things.
She smiled faintly. "Alright, Aurelion," she said. "Let's say ı accept your offer. I understand your curiosity. And yes, you have the right to learn some basic things." She extended her hand, this time not to his shoulder, but as if gesturing for him to follow. "Come with me. Let's go to my office. Let's give you… a little geography lesson."
A momentary, cold glint of triumph flashed in Aurelion's eyes, but he quickly concealed it. Without a word, he began to walk behind Mistress Linnea down the corridor, towards the manager's office. The game had begun, and he had won the first move.
When they entered the office, Mistress Linnea sat Aurelion on the stool opposite her desk. Pointing to the rough map on the wall, she began to explain: "We are on the Everfrost Continent, in the far north. This city is Ulfgard, at the foot of the snowy mountains, one of the 13 great Northerner Cities. The war just ended, you know, everywhere is being rebuilt, everyone is trying to strengthen themselves. That's why this orphanage is so crowded…" When it came to his family "The war was very cruel, like many heroes, your mother and father probably got lost protecting you and our lands."
Aurelion listened intently, carving every new word into his mind. This world surfaced. It became a little more concrete. When Mistress Linnea finished speaking, she added. "If, as you promised, you don't poke around those subjects, and direct your curiosity to lessons and reading, especially to the reading, writing, and logic lessons where you've shown intelligence, I'll continue to tell you things you don't know from time to time." Aurelion nodded. Just as he was about to ask something new, there was a knock on the door and Roric entered.
The Captain looked first at Mistress Linnea, then at Aurelion with questioning eyes. "Is everything alright?"
"Yes, Captain," Mistress Linnea said calmly. "Aurelion was just a little… curious, let's say. We were discussing some basic topics." She approached Roric and lowered her voice just outside the door. Aurelion couldn't hear what was being said, but he could roughly guess what they were talking about.
Roric entered again, stood in front of Aurelion. "So, you're not just causing trouble anymore, you're asking questions too" he said in a neutral tone. "Mistress Linnea is going to help you."
Aurelion nodded silently.
The corner of Roric's lip curled up almost imperceptibly. "Good. Maybe, If you really behave, don't upset Mistress Linnea, and study hard… It's not a promise, but… maybe I'll tell you stories of the old heroes of the North, how they fought giant ice monsters. It might be interesting."
Aurelion's eyes lit up. War… Monsters… First hand information! This was far more valuable than the geography lesson he would get from Linnea. He nodded eagerly without any hesitation. This unexpected offer had crowned his victory for the day.
When the ordinary chaos of dinner and the subsequent retreat to the dormitory ended, the silence of the night was slowly descending upon the orphanage. Aurelion was sitting on his designated bed.
Those clumsy but determined exercises in the dead of morning… The stubborn resistance his body offered. That annoying, abstract conversation with Elara… "The river within," "unawakened"… That secret, desperate attempt at magic in the corridor… And then that chess game with Linnea… The small victory he won.
He turned his head to the window, looked at the moonlight outside. He had made progress, yes. But the main goal? Magic? That 'transformation'? There was nothing tangible about them. His attempts hadn't worked, his questions were either unanswered or dismissed with abstract metaphors.
He put the pieces together. His own body… It still couldn't fully execute even the simplest commands. His knowledge… It was close to zero regarding how magic or that transformation worked. His control… He was still dependent on others, even his most basic need, food, was not under his control.
Once again, that old, familiar feeling of tightness welled up inside him. A haste, a desire to reach that power as soon as possible, to break free from these limitations.
But this time, a cold mist of logic settled over this feeling. Mistress Linnea was right, perhaps for a different reason, but she was right. A wrong step could ruin this already fragile beginning. Foolishly flailing about on his own was a waste of precious time and energy.
There was no anger or frustration on his face anymore. His eyes, glinting gold in the moonlight, seemed to see the long path of the future. "Insufficient… he thought calmly. "This body is insufficient. Knowledge is insufficient. Just wanting, just observing… is not enough to progress for now. Instead of foolishly, blindly struggling… I must focus."
His strategy was crystallizing in his mind. Priorities had to be set. "I must lay the foundation. I must patiently wait for this body to grow, to strengthen, and guide this process correctly. That disciplined training every day… muscle memory must be formed, control must increase."
"I must absorb knowledge. I must use the agreement I made with Mistress Linnea to the fullest. I must perfect my reading and writing. I must learn the history of this world, its geography, perhaps its simple laws. Every crumb of a story Roric tells could be valuable."
"And most importantly… I must be patient." Even thinking this word annoyed him, but he could no longer deny its necessity. "When the right time comes… when knowledge and body are ready… when opportunity knocks… then the real quest for power will begin. Then what I have learned, what I have accumulated, will gain meaning."
That gnawing restlessness within him had given way to a cold, long term plan. This was not a surrender. It was a strategic retreat for a larger battle, a period of preparation. "I understand…" he whispered to himself, his voice lost in the silence of the night. "Just wanting is not enough. I must wait. I must grow. And then… then everything will be different."