Hello, reader!
Ahem. So, in the last chapter, I died a pretty pathetic and pointless death at the hands of fate. And then, just like that, I somehow got reincarnated as a slim—I mean, a baby in some unknown place.
The shock was so much, I completely ignored the nipple in my face trying to breastfeed me!
Apparently, I'm about a year old now, and my new name is Alexander. My new mom said it. Don't know my last name yet, though.
I was exhausted from the long, spiritual travel (actually, I wasn't tired in the least), so I just let the cute lady breastfeed and baby me.
She was really affectionate, and I didn't mind being spoiled now and then.
I don't know if you should be hearing this from me, but… the milk tasted like something made from corn and sea water.
Right now, I'm lying on a bed in a small room that looks like it was lifted from a baby catalog. Toys everywhere. Pastel walls. Total nursery setup.
So... this means… I'm not in a medieval fantasy world?
Or is this a fantasy world that just happens to look modern?
Nah, that sounds dumb.
Anyway, now that I've confirmed I'm alone...
(Alright. Before you explain what you meant by "Guardian Candidate," I've got a few questions for you.)
{Of course, Master.}
(Good. And also, keep calling me "Master." It's doing wonders for my emotional boost right now.)
{As you wish, Master.}
"Okay. First question: I really did reincarnate?"
{Yes, you did. I personally brought your soul over from the other world.}
"So—you're confessing to kidnapping?"
{No, no. You were chosen as a Guardian Candidate for this world. I simply retrieved your soul on the gods' command.}
"...Hold up. Don't tell me, are you—or the gods—responsible for my death?"
{Okay, I won't tell you.}
...So I was murdered.
{I didn't say that!}
"Anyway—why let me keep my memories? What's the point?"
{Memories are a core part of the soul. Removing them would have weakened your identity, your ego—and affected your strength.}
Then why not just pick someone from this world? And also—how come I don't remember being born?!
{You don't?}
"I don't!"
I mean, come on. As a man, I feel like I'd remember seeing my exit route while leaving the womb, don't you think?
{Hmmm. Wouldn't that be incest?}
"Just staring is okay! It's for educational purposes!"
{As for why you were brought here, Master… I believe the gods answered your dying wish. Also, still incest if you watch.}
"My dying wish?"
You mean, when I shamelessly declared going after every girl I lay eyes on?
That's what they responded to? Also, it's not incest if I just watch! Not to mention—I literally just came out of it!
{Yes, Master. I was doing some work in your world, then got the call to help you cross over. You were selected to serve the gods as a Guardian. Also… gross, Master.}
So the gods are up there just… deciding my fate, huh? And I'm supposed to be their little Guardian puppet? Also, not gross—beautiful.
{To be honest, Master, the gods are kind of a bored bunch. It's less about you serving them and more about them wanting entertainment.}
Sigh... Being used like that by the very beings who probably killed me...
{So… what do you want to do, Master?}
"What do I want to do?"
Heh. Check the novel's title! I didn't actually think it would happen, but… this development ain't half bad.
I'll chase my own desires. I'll do what I want. The gods can go screw themselves for all I care!
{Are you sure? Defying the gods won't be any easy feat.}
To be honest, I don't even know who they are. And I don't fear any consequences anymore. I was dead just a few hours ago, remember?
{Hahaha. That's just like you, Master!}
"Just like me"? And what would you know about—wait. Oh, right.
You were stalking me back in my world. That's how you know.
{Phrasing, Master. You make me sound like a creep. Like you.}
"Ow. But before I interrogate you further on this whole Guardian matter... Who are you again?"
{Hmmmm... Why don't I show you...?}
After the voice in my head said that, some sparkly little particles began forming right on the bed.
It was a bit tough sitting up as a baby, but I managed.
The ethereal phenomenon happening before my very eyes... I'd never seen anything like it. Not in real life, at any rate.
The lights gathered into a silhouette of a person, and as the glow faded, a woman remained.
Long, silvery-blue hair. Crimson eyes. A white blazer that did little to hide her chest or navel.
And one dangerous-looking blue skirt clinging to her hips like it had a mission for my virtue.
Her skin was fair like a goddess's. Not that I've ever met a goddess, but this had to be what one looked like.
She looked about twenty. But I was a hundred percent sure—she's not human.
"I am Seraphina. Pleased to meet you, Master."
Hearing her voice in person? It was like a dream. A dangerously seductive dream.
She smelled like heaven. Some otherworldly scent with floral notes and something I couldn't even describe, but it worked. It worked too well.
I silently crawled straight to her, seemingly hypnotized, and planted my face in her chest.
"YOU SMELL HEAVENLY, SERAPHINA!!"
"WHY, THANK YOU, MASTER!"
*
Still glued to the soft embrace of the pretty goddess from this new world, I went ahead and began my interrogation.
What was she exactly? What did it mean to be a Guardian Candidate? And—most importantly—what were my odds of finding a girlfriend? Fast.
She answered everything while gently rubbing my small baby back. That was nice. Weirdly nice.
Turns out, about this Guardian Candidate thing... I was currently the only one for this generation.
For now, though. Soon, the others would start to bloom.
And yeah, apparently, it's basically another slave corporation. Just with higher stakes. Like, your life.
When a child is born, they're sometimes chosen as a Guardian Candidate, and thus—more "mana" than anyone around.
Their bodies are also enhanced. To superhuman or nigh-superhuman.
Why, you ask?
Because when a Guardian Candidate hits around sixteen, they're granted their own personal system assistant, along with a shiny arsenal of skills that officially marks them as a bonafide candidate.
As for what a Guardian is:
Basically, it's what a Guardian Candidate becomes—if they win the favor of the gods, in the long run.
And that Guardian eventually gets the ultimate job as absolute protector of the world. with some other perks or so. Sometimes even bodyguard to the gods themselves.
There are usually 24 Guardian Candidates per generation. Most of whom—unfortunately—are not my friends. In fact, a few might try to purge me. To reduce competition.
It's funny, you know?
The gods make people work their butts off—SAVING THE WORLD, DOING RIDICULOUS AMOUNTS OF HARD LABOR—all just to "prove" they're worthy to become what they already are: a damn PROTECTOR OF THE WORLD!