I'm realizing it's hard for me to let go of something I never had,
All this time I've hated myself because I wasn't what you wanted,
I wanted to be mad at you but I only have myself to blame,
The times we shared and the memories we made,
I'll remember it all as I cry myself to sleep,
Unable to move on from the past,
I'm afraid to see what the future has in store for me...
Throughout the years I've done nothing but love you,
But despite it all I was never enough,
Constantly watching you chase after the next guy,
Consistently being treated like shit by them all,
Crying to me after every heartbreak,
And my disillusioned ass coming every single time,
Hoping for my chance to change your experience,
Yet every intention I had has been meaningless,
Never quite seeing me as more than a fling,
I finally realized that to you I didn't mean a thing,
It took some time but at least I've moved on,
And the moment I did, you said you'd give me a chance,
You couldn't tell me that anything had changed,
All you could tell me was that you had time to think,
Somehow these past 9 years weren't enough,
Had you thought about me before we wouldn't be here now,
No longer am I willing to jump through your hoops,
I can't come back and pretend to be okay,
I wish we'd ended things on a better note,
But there are no more feelings left on that boat...
I can't even remember how long it's been since we've last talked,
And I saw your boyfriend having all the freedom you didn't allow me,
Although you said it was me that you wanted,
You clearly couldn't wait, at least not like I did for you,
Now all of a sudden you hit me up out of the blue,
Asking if things are okay, and if I want to get together,
I said I'm not sure, or rather I'm not up for it,
There was no way in hell I could still be interested,
You already have a man in your life,
So why did you need me back now?
You thought I just didn't want to see you,
But boy that's all I ever wanted to do,
It was you that didn't want to see me and thought me a fool,
Something's telling me it's all just a set up,
Or maybe it's just another chance for you to cheat,
Regardless of the motives I just can't accept,
Not interested in him, nor am I still wanting you,
Hopefully after this, you finally get a clue...