It felt as if his soul were wrapped in an abyss of desolation and absolute hopelessness.
Sure, now he had a gift, but the quality of the gift was tied to the level of energy awakened by the user. And Matt's energy level was zero, therefore, his gift would be absolute trash.
Matt wasn't even curious to see it, it wasn't worth it. He simply sank into his thoughts.
His future was over. Not only that, he wouldn't even have the chance to change it.
But that wasn't the worst part.
Using all his strength, Matt put on his best smile as he approached the beautiful orange-haired young woman. She welcomed him the same way, with her dazzling smile.
"At last, I've awakened." Matt's voice sounded weak, almost lost in the storm.
The girl's smile grew even more. Without saying a word, she pulled out another cloak similar to her own. Then she approached and wrapped his body with it, making sure it ended in a hug.
Suddenly, the cold dissipated, replaced by the warmth of her body.
The girl rested her head on his chest and with a sweet and delicate voice said, "You don't have to hold back."
He could feel the tears crystallizing on his face.
Suddenly, he wished to remain there.
He wished to feel that warmth for the rest of his life.
He stayed silent for a moment before answering, "I'm fine…"
He was lying.
He could feel his world slowly falling apart.
Soon there would be nothing left.
After another pause, he said, "Let's go somewhere less cold."
Matt could feel her nod slightly before letting go and leading the way. For a moment, he saw how her small and delicate back slowly moved away before following her.
'I wish we could be together forever.'
However, that fate wasn't possible. His uselessness had condemned them to part ways. This was their last night together.
As they walked side by side, the silence between them felt heavy. But he didn't know what to say. He wasn't in the mood to talk.
Even so, he forced himself to speak, for it might be the last time he'd hear her sweet voice.
"What time do you leave?"
Matt glanced at her as they walked.
Her profile, her fair skin, and her cheeks reddened by the cold seemed to give off a glow of their own and enchanting.
"Hm, the general will begin his pilgrimage at sunrise. The aspirants to sanctity will follow him to the next city."
Of course, the world was extremely dangerous for aspirants. Their mission was to help, to spread hope even in the most inhospitable corners. Therefore, fighting was forbidden to them, even if that meant dying at the hands of a beast.
Aspirants relied entirely on the protection of the guards and were required to hire scouts to accompany them.
Of course, Matt no longer had the possibility of becoming one of those scouts.
"Will you miss me?" Someone like him didn't even have the right to be by her side.
A symbol of hope walking beside hopelessness? As nice as it might sound, not even he could imagine a situation where that would end well.
Even just speaking with her could condemn him for tainting hope.
And that was the reason why their paths were destined to separate.
Suddenly, Marie's steps stopped. Her gaze dropped to the ground, and her hair fell over her face.
Matt stopped in front of her, watching her with sadness.
Her tears fell to the ground.
In that moment, Matt felt something break inside him.
He wanted to leap forward and hold her, to beg her to abandon the path of sanctity so they could be together for the rest of their lives.
But he didn't.
He couldn't deny her mission, couldn't force her to stay with someone useless. And that hurt more than anything else. He could accept his fate as hopelessness, but he couldn't bear for her to walk the same path.
So, without saying another word, they continued their way to the orphanage where they lived. This too would be their last night there.
…
Matt laid his cloak over the hay before lying down on it.
Of course, as the only hopelessness in the orphanage, Matt wasn't allowed to share a room with the other children. Instead, they let him live in the stable alongside the orphanage's horses.
The place reeked of dung, and the wooden walls were full of holes that let in the wind, barely shielding them from the cold. Still, he couldn't say he wouldn't miss it. After all, he had lived there for many years.
The two of them lay on their cloaks atop the hay, staring up at the worn-out roof.
To anyone else, seeing a sanctity like Marie in a place like this would be unacceptable—but what did it matter? In this moment, it was their own sanctuary. Nothing and no one could disturb them.
Marie sat up on the hay and looked at him for a moment before asking,
"So… even if it's of the mundane class… Could you show me your Gift?"
Matt looked at her for a moment.
Though he instinctively knew what it was and how it worked, it hadn't been revealed during the test, so Marie had no idea what it was.
"Of course…" he said softly.
Even though he knew all of this, a small spark of curiosity stirred within him.
"Alright…" he said, somewhat displeased—though part of him was still curious to see it for himself.
Matt extended one of his hands and explained, "It's an emission-type Gift and…"
Suddenly, a black, viscous, opalescent liquid oozed from his palm. Its surface was inconsistent as if it were somehow breathing, giving it a grotesque and unsettling appearance.
"It does… this."
It didn't do anything—no poison, no healing, no burning, no movement. It simply emerged from his body as a disgusting, useless mass.
Maybe if he had energy, he could do something. But that wasn't the case. For Matt, this Gift was utterly worthless.
They both stared at the liquid in silence for a few moments.
Then, a faint smile appeared on Matt's face.
"Just imagine Sister Sophia's face if she found this in her soup."
Marie's face lit up as she let out a small laugh.
"Brother Daniel could use it as a wig."
Matt couldn't help but imagine one of the orphanage's caretakers with his Gift on his head to hide his baldness. Suddenly, he couldn't hold back his laughter.
Somehow, he felt like it actually wasn't such a bad idea.
"I could even charge him by the hour."
They looked at each other for a moment before collapsing into uncontrollable laughter.
That night, Marie didn't return to her room. She stayed with Matt until the very end, coming up with silly ways to use his Gift to prank people in the village.
Eventually, they both fell asleep from exhaustion.
At dawn, Matt awoke and immediately turned to look for her.
A small part of him still held out hope of seeing her lying beside him on the hay.
But she was no longer there.
Suddenly, a deep sadness took hold of him.