Wei Wuxian placed more congee in Wen Yuan's bowl, noticing with relief that some of the weight the child had lost was starting to return. The boy was still anxious if Wei Wuxian was out of his sight for very long, but he seemed to be thriving despite all the upheaval to his life the war had brought. Wei Wuxian hoped that the sects would find a balance with both Wen Ruohan and Jin Guangshan out of the picture, so that A-Yuan's generation could grow up without the constant threat of war. Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji's generation were raised as weapons, but A-Yuan didn't need to be. Wouldn't be, if Wei Wuxian had anything to say about it.
But as a sectless cultivator currently on the outs with 3 of the major sects, he knew his role was more to stay out of the way and not raise already high tensions between the sects.
But staying still and doing nothing had never been something Wei Wuxian could do. His recent realization about his feelings for Lan Wangji made it even worse. He needed to be doing something , and start establishing what 'normal' would look like for him and A-Yuan now that the war was over. But first, Wei Wuxian needed to assess how recovered his injuries were.
He wondered if Wen Qing was already ensconced in with her patients and research. It would certainly make his plan to test his strength on the sparring field if he didn't have to worry about getting permission from his overly protective doctor. Wen Yuan had spent enough time in Cloud Recesses to have been thoroughly corrupted into not speaking during meals, so Wei Wuxian took the opportunity to scan the other occupants in the dining hall to see if there was any sign of Wen Qing.
Unlike the dining area of Cloud Recesses, the hall in the Unclean Realm was full of voices. The end of the war and the fall of the Wen sect and scandal of the Jin left no shortage of gossip to be discussed, which was definitely not forbidden in the Unclean Realm.
" ... heard that Jin Guangshan tried to bribe Sect Leader Nie for…"
"... the Yao clan has only two members left. I wonder if they will be able to rebuild…"
".. more than half the smaller sects were wiped out before the larger sects got involved. Now there are no cultivators to protect the civilians in those territories…"
"GusuLan and YunmengJiang need marriage alliances the most. They were the hardest hit…"
"... Jiang Yanli and the new Sect Leader Jin…"
"... what about the Twin Jades? Neither of them are married…"
",,, Hanguang-Jun could marry out or have his bride marry in…"
"... Hanguang-Jun has been working closely with the Jin, and the Lan need funds for rebuilding. Do you think…"
Wei Wuxian shoved the last steam bun in his mouth, turning to see Wen Yuan finishing his bowl of congee. He didn't want to think about political alliances and especially not the marriages required to secure them. Still, it was a good reminder of Wei Wuxian's place in things. His body might be compatible with Lan Wangji as a cultivation partner, and Wei Wuxian could no longer deny. But it wouldn't change the fact that Lan Wangji was the heir to the Lan sect, and his marriage - if it happened - would need to be about helping his sect rebuild.
Wei Wuxian was not a candidate that would make even the longest, most desperate list of potential political partners for the Second Jade of Lan. He had stood maybe a tiny chance when it was purely about a cultivation partner, due to Wei Wuxian's core, but in terms of political alliances, Wei Wuxian had absolutely nothing to offer. Wei Wuxian was not foolish enough to have any misconceptions on that point.
He stood, taking hold of Wen Yuan's hand as he swallowed the last of his food. The sooner Wei Wuxian could get back to his life as a rogue cultivator, far from the reaches of sect politics and intrigue, the better he would be. It was time to see if all of this miraculous healing that had outed Wei Wuxian's ridiculous attachment to Lan Wangji was really as good as Wen Qing had made it out to be.
"A-Yuan. Let's go out to the training courtyard, ok?"
As expected, A-Yuan's face lit up with excitement at the prospect of another day outside, battling imaginary foes. Wei Wuxian led them out to one of the practice courtyards that was not currently in use, and began slowly moving through the Jiang sword forms. He started off slow, with the basic forms, and slowly increased the speed and complexity as he tested his body's range of movement. A-Yuan moved around him, doing a combination of mimicking particular moves and occasionally racing off to fight an imaginary enemy.
He vaguely noticed the increasing number of people gathering at the edges of the courtyard to watch him, but he paid it no mind. Back when he was First Disciple at Lotus Pier, the other disciples would often gather to watch him practice. It never bothered him.
Wei Wuxian had never been one for traditional meditation, but he had always found himself able to achieve a clear, fully focused mind when he went through the forms. He was finally able to push his distracting thoughts about Lan Wangji out of his mind as he focused on his own body, breath, and movement. His muscles felt fluid and strong, though they still pulled a bit around the still-healing wound on his chest. Not quite back at full strength, but definitely not like he'd had a fucking arrow in his chest less than two weeks ago.
The onlookers were not silent, and Wei Wuxian heard murmurs about how miraculous his healing was. The tone was a mixture of awe and fear. Some wondered if the rumors of Wei Wuxian no longer being fully human were true. The link between him and Lan Wangji was not something that was public knowledge (Wei Wuxian was sure that Lan Wangji would be embarrassed if that information spread, and was glad he'd heard nothing about it outside of the four of them who were there when it was discovered), so his recovery from what had been a near fatal wound would likely only further the rumors that he was… changed.
His lips curved into a dark, bitter smile. Wei Wuxian was fine with that. Let them think that he was indestructible. Maybe it would make some of the power-hungry cultivators who had tried attacking his sister in their attempt to get the seal think twice.
"Wei Wuxian!"
Nie Mingjue's voice boomed out across the courtyard. Wei Wuxian finished the arc of movement, then stopped, turning to face the towering man who was approaching.
"Red Blade Master," Wei Wuxian greeted.
"It's good to see you out of the sick room. Though much sooner than expected."
There was a question in the statement, but Wei Wuxian did not want anyone other than the people who already knew to find out about his one-sided bond with Lan Wangji. He would protect Lan Zhan's reputation… it was the least he owed the man.
"Wen Daifu is a remarkable healer," Wei Wuxian said, instead.
Nie Mingjue narrowed his eyes at the response, clearly aware that it was not the full story. He did not push, at least not at that moment, and Wei Wuxian was grateful. He liked Nie Mingjue, and the sect leader had opened his sect to protect Jiang Yanli. If he pushed, Wei Wuxian would probably answer if asked directly. Instead, Nie Mingjue gave a short nod.
"We should spar when you are up to full strength again," the Nie Sect Leader said.
Wei Wuxian smiled. "It would be my honor to give what challenge I could. I'm afraid in my current condition, it would not be very interesting for you."
"Mm," Nie Mingjue said, not disagreeing.
When it came to physical fighting, almost no one could give Red Blade Master much of a challenge, but Wei Wuxian would be lying if he said he wouldn't love to try when he was full strength again.
"In the meantime, I was hoping I could make myself useful to the Nie sect. With so many of the minor sects wiped out, I have heard there are many villages without help."
Nie Mingjue frowned, nodding in agreement. He glanced over to where Wen Yuan was still playing with his wooden practice sword.
"We have more requests than we have cultivators to send. But are you wanting to leave so soon?"
Wei Wuxian let his gaze also move to Wen Yuan. The boy was loath to let Wei Wuxian out of his sight. It would be hard on him if Wei Wuxian was gone for any serious amount of time.
"With some of the battles having been fought relatively close to the Unclean Realm, I would imagine there are areas nearby that have requested aid dealing with restless spirits," Wei Wuxian said.
Nie Mingjue agreed. "You are fast on your sword, as I recall. I have at least a dozen requests that are within two hours of here by sword. Most of them are low level night hunts. Not exciting for a cultivator of your level, but since you're recovering, it might suit you. You could leave in the evening, and be back by morning for most of them. He could stay with us and train with the younger disciples while you're here."
Wei Wuxian nodded. It would be a good exchange. He could help the Nie Sect and the surrounding communities, and the Nie Sect would serve as a home base for A-Yuan.
Wei Wuxian lifted his arms in front of him, joining his hands and offering a formal bow.
"This one thanks you for your protection of A-Yuan."
Nie Mingjue returned the gesture. "No thanks are necessary. You protected the Nie. We will protect you and yours."
When Nie Mingjue left, A-Yuan came over.
"Xian-gege is leaving?" the child asked, his voice quavering slightly.
Wei Wuxian cursed himself, internally. He had really forgotten what it was like to be a child, pretending not to hear the adults talking around you, but taking in every word that was said. He should have talked to Nie Mingjue privately. He crouched down in front of the child.
"I will be gone for a few hours at night. There are people who need help, who aren't in as safe a place as you and I are right now. But I'll be back by the time you wake up."
Wen Yuan looked at him steadily. Wei Wuxian wondered if the child's parents had told him the same thing, only to never return.
"Promise?"
Wei Wuxian barely managed not to flinch. He did not want to lie, but he also did not want Wen Yuan to be afraid. He knew that his sister would be there for A-Yuan, if ever there came a time that Wei Wuxian did not return, but he would give whatever reassurances he could.
"The night hunts I am going on are very simple ones. I did them when I was a child. If there is anything more dangerous, I will come back and get help. I can promise you that."
If Jiang Cheng had been here, he would have scoffed at the idea that Wei Wuxian would ever ask for help when he never had before. But Wei Wuxian knew what it was like to lose his parents to a night hunt gone wrong. He would not take foolish risks while he was recovering from his injuries.
A-Yuan nodded after a moment, evidently deciding that the promise was sufficient. Wei Wuxian grinned, and ruffled the boy's hair.
"Excellent! Then let's continue our training so we have time to wash up before lunch."
"A-Yuan will train with Xian-gege! Then I can come with you on your night hunts!"
Wei Wuxian nearly staggered under the surge of emotion that swamped him at the simple words. A-Yuan was obviously far too young at the moment to go with him. But he would grow. Could they really stay together? Could he really have a future with this child, teaching him what he knew, night-hunting together?
Wei Wuxian had never really thought about what it would be like to have a child before. But he fiercely wanted the future that flickered tentatively in his mind with A-Yuan. He tamped down the thought of Lan Wangji being there with them, knowing it was impossible. But he could have A-Yuan.
"Alright," Wei Wuxian managed to push the words out past the lump in his throat. "But if you want to night hunt with me, you will have to work very hard!"
"Mm!" A-Yuan said, nodding happily.
They spent the rest of the morning together. Wei Wuxian showed him the simple breath technique that his mother had shown him for focusing the mind and circulating the spiritual energy, when he had been old enough to start working towards forming a golden core at a very young age. It was one of the only teachings he had from her. It was not the same method that was used by the Jiang or the Lan. Wei Wuxian did not know if it was from Baoshan Sanren, or his mother's family, but it was his own.
And now it was A-Yuan's.
The evening was hard. A-Yuan was fussy about going to sleep, worried about whether Wei Wuxian would be back in the morning or not. Wei Wuxian knew it would take time for the child to be able to trust that things would be ok. He remembered his first several months in Lotus Pier, waiting for the moment when he would be thrown out, or that somehow, Uncle Fengmian would disappear and he would be left to fend for himself against the dogs and Madam Yu. Worrying about what would happen to the younger Jiang Cheng and Jiang Yanli, since they had no experience with things like how to scavenge for food or find shelter in the rainy season.
While the fear had never fully gone away, it had lessened over the first year with the Jiangs enough that it no longer consumed all of Wei Wuxian's waking thoughts. He hoped it would be the same for A-Yuan. He knew that the best way to show A-Yuan that he was safe was to set up a routine and be consistent. He would make sure that - for the next month at least - he was never gone for more than half a day, and A-Yuan would always know when he was leaving and when he was returning. It would take time to build the trust, given all the boy had been through, but Wei Wuxian had faith that A-Yuan would find his footing again.
Nie Huaisang had given A-Yuan a set of dark robes that matched Wei Wuxian's for him to wear while training with the Nie children.
"Unless he wants to officially join the Nie Sect, he should have his own clothes," the Nie sect heir had said.
Wei Wuxian had frowned. "What about the ones he's wearing?"
Lan Wangji had seemed strangely adamant that Wen Yuan keep the Lan robes that he had arrived in. Wei Wuxian didn't really mind. After all, the Lan sect had kept him safe during the war. And if seeing Wen Yuan wearing Lan Wangji's sect colors allowed Wei Wuxian to indulge in a tiny fantasy of them being a family together, well… no one had to know.
But Nie Huaisang's fan had fluttered in the way that Wei Wuxian had learned meant that the man had thought of something that was important, and was trying to make it seem like it was something silly.
"I don't know, Wei-xiong. I really don't know, but it just seems like he doesn't really match with your color scheme?"
Wei Wuxian had paused, his mind trying to find the hidden meaning behind his friend's words.
"I mean… the Lan Sect doesn't have jurisdiction over you. Thank goodness, right? With all those rules and edicts."
Edicts like the one where they have condemned you and would have punished you if they had any authority over you at all, Nei Huaisang hadn't said the words, but they were clear.
If A-Yuan wore Lan robes, it implied that they would have ownership over him. And if they were still dead set on punishing Wei Wuxian for his heretical acts, then…
Wei Wuxian had bowed.
"This one thanks you for your thoughtfulness, and gratefully accepts the robes."
It was yet another reminder that - whatever his feelings might be for Lan Zhan - they were never going to go anywhere.
The moon was nearly full as Wei Wuxian left the Unclean Realm to go help a nearby village that had been plagued by a spirit of some sort. It felt strange to be fully alone in the night air as he flew silently on his sword, the silvery light from the moon washing down over the land.
He caught himself looking over his shoulder for pristine white robes that would be glowing softly in the moonlight, and felt annoyance flare at himself at the disappointment that flickered through him when the sky remained empty behind him.
Of course Lan Wangji would have better things to do than accompany Wei Wuxian on a night hunt that any fourteen-year-old cultivator could handle on their own. Wei Wuxian was just being stupid.
He had been spoiled by the amount of time he had been spending in the man's company recently. Between the Xiangliu and the war, it had made sense for them to be together, but that was no longer true. They had different paths to walk in this life, and Wei Wuxian needed to remember his own.
The spirit was quickly dealt with, the grateful villagers providing Wei Wuxian with food and drink before he returned to the Unclean Realm. It had been a while since he had been able to enjoy alcohol, between the war and Wen Qing's strict monitoring after his injury.
The familiar burn of the baijiu in his throat as he drank his first cup was bliss. He had discovered at the age of 14 how well it could take the edge off his thoughts, dulling his hyperactive mind enough to let him catch his breath.
He had missed it.
He was careful not to drink so much that it would affect his ability to get back to the Unclean Realm before A-Yuan woke, ordering only one more jar before heading out. Knowing that A-Yuan was waiting for him, would be devastated if he didn't return, anchored Wei Wuxian in a way he had never been before. Other than Jiang Yanli, Wei Wuxian often felt as though the rest of the Jiang family would have been quietly relieved if he had gone on a night hunt and never returned when he was younger. His shijie would have grieved for him, but she had a full life ahead of her, and did not need him there for it. A-Yuan was different. A-Yuan needed him.
He wondered if this was what family felt like.
He arrived back to his bed in the room that adjoined A-Yuan's still hours before dawn, his mind just fuzzy enough that he allowed images of Lan Wangji to fill his thoughts without the deluge of guilt that always accompanied them. Silly daydreams of raising A-Yuan together with Lan Wangji, night hunting together. Living in a small home, away from all the sects, just the three of them.
It was foolish, but he could blame it on the alcohol as he drifted off to sleep.
Wei Wuxian was lulled into a sense of normalcy over the next three weeks, following the same pattern of short, simple night-hunts, time with A-Yuan, and forcing himself not to think of Lan Wangji.
The latter was difficult, because every inn he stopped at had rumors of the political machinations as the sects scrambled to fill the power vacuum left by Wen Ruohan and Jin Guangshan, and almost always the talk would circle around to the various arranged marriages between sects both large and small that were being announced. In his simple black robes, he did not draw attention to himself, and was able to hear the relatively uncensored version of the tales that were being told.
Speculation on the marital status of the Second Jade of GusuLan inevitably was brought up. At first, it was general, the way it had been for any notable cultivator, but of late, it had become more specific, centering around the number of times that Lan Wangji had been seen in the presence of Luo Qinyang.
The thought of Lan Zhan wed to one of the many cultivators who would surely be clamoring to be his cultivation partner caused his stomach to twist. But Wei Wuxian had always liked MianMian. She was not as strong as Lan Wangji, but she was honorable and not afraid to stand up for what was right. Before the war, there had been a lot of pressure for Lan Wangji to find a cultivation partner that could help him cultivate to immortality and bring prestige to the Lan sect, given that no one had managed that feat in centuries. The need for sects to forge tight alliances after the war had changed things. Political ties were now the most important, at least based on the rumor mill in the villages Wei Wuxian passed through.
MianMian was not a strong enough cultivator to enable Lan Wangji to reach immortality, but she would provide a solid political alliance, and was someone that Wei Wuxian thought matched Lan Wangji at least in her morals and sense of justice.
Wei Wuxian wondered if Lan Wangji would be relieved to have a more traditional arranged marriage, rather than being pressured to try to reach immortality. Dual cultivation required very frequent 'acts of intimacy'. Daily was ideal. Given how strongly Lan Wangji had reacted to someone even brushing against the sleeve of his pristine robes, Wei Wuxian couldn't imagine the man being able to tolerate something like that.
An arranged marriage of the ordinary type had very different expectations. Wei Wuxian had seen that between Madam Yu and Jiang Fengmian. It required almost no physical acts of intimacy at all, outside of the initial consummation of the marriage, and possibly a few more acts if heirs were required. They did not need to share chambers, or really interact much at all.
That would surely be preferable to Lan Wangji, who had always been quite clear about his aversion to physical touch of any sort. He wondered if MianMian would be ok with that sort of marriage. Probably. It was far better than most arranged marriages.
They would be beautiful together, Wei Wuxian told himself firmly. They would be compatible.
He forced himself not to think about what it would be like to dual cultivate with Lan Wangji. He drank more than usual that night, stumbling into bed.
That night, Wei Wuxian's dreams were much less innocent than in previous nights, and he woke with sweat-dampened sheets and his fingertips tingling with remembered images of what it felt like when his hands sliding under Lan Zhan's robes and pushing them aside. The rest of his body was shivering with the hazy memories of strong shoulders and arms, bared to his heated gaze, that gripped Wei Ying hard and pressed him down into the mattress. He tried to shake away the shadowy, false memories of their bodies pressed together, Lan Zhan's weight bearing down on him, keeping him anchored. The smooth, defined muscles that Wei Wuxian had seen long ago in the Cold Springs were dredged up from his mind and inserted into his heated imaginings, along with the scent of sandalwood that always surrounded Lan Wangji. The intense, golden eyes that so often stared at him, focused and seeing him in a way that only Lan Zhan has ever bothered to do...
Wei Wuxian drew a shuddering breath, trying to tamp down on the residual arousal from the dream still surging through his body. Luckily, A-Yuan had gotten used to Wei Wuxian sleeping late in the mornings and, other than a quick peek at him to ensure that Wei Wuxian had made it back safely during the night, A-Yuan left him to sleep in as long as he wanted.
Wei Wuxian looked down between his thighs at the evidence of the nature of his dream lewdly tenting the sheet. He was shaking and achingly hard. He wanted… he wanted things he had no business wanting. But when had he ever been wise?
He forced himself to regulate his breathing, hoping his erection would go away on its own. But the rise and fall of his chest shifted the sheets, causing them to drag fractionally over his already sensitized cock. The precum that was leaking from its head caused the fabric to cling damply in a way that only increased the sensitive friction.
" Fuck, " Wei Wuxian breathed out quietly, clenching his jaw as his hips flexed up reflexively.
His eyes fluttered closed. During the day, he was able to control his thoughts, most of the time. At night, he was at their mercy, and the more he tried to shove the imagery from the dream away, the more it played out over and over in his mind's eye.
Wei Wuxian knew it would be only a matter of time before Wen Yuan came looking for him. He couldn't lay in bed all day trying to will away his erection. He shoved the sheets down, hoping to avoid leaving any evidence of his hopeless lust behind, and forced his mind to blank. He refused to keep thoughts of Lan Wangji in his head while he roughly gripped his dick, stroking it in harsh, punishing strokes until he came, shuddering, on his stomach.
He lay on the bed staring up at the ceiling, hoping it would be a few more weeks before he saw Lan Wangji again. He had no idea how he would face him, how he would act with him when shameful desires and images kept flooding his mind at the mere thought of the man.
Wen Yuan was in lessons with the younger Nie disciples when Wei Wuxian finished bathing and went to find him. He didn't want to interrupt the class, so he just watched from a distance, feeling a sense of peace as he saw the child he was beginning to think of as his own following along with the lessons and occasionally laughing with some of the other children.
Wen Yuan was safe. Wei Wuxian may have failed at many things in his life, but there was no doubt that Wen Yuan was safe because of his actions.
His and Lan Wangji's.
The thought made him wish for foolish things, for them to be keeping Wen Yuan safe together, training him together, watching him grow together.
He pushed those thoughts away even more harshly than he did the lustful ones, because they were even more dangerously seductive to someone like Wei Wuxian, who had always craved a family of his own.
There was the usual traffic of other people moving around the Unclean Realm. He generally paid them no mind, but his attention was caught when a group of cultivators passed, mentioning that emissaries from several of the other sects would be arriving shortly to discuss various things with Nie Mingjue. Hanguang-Jun and Mianmian were amongst those expected to arrive.
Wei Wuxian was not ready to face Lan Wangji yet, especially not when he would be accompanied by Luo Qingyang. Levering himself away from the stone pillar he'd been leaning against, Wei Wuxian headed towards the city gates. He hadn't caught up with Meng Yao or Nie Mingjue yet to pick up a new night hunt, since he didn't usually go two nights in a row, but Wei Wuxian could spend the rest of the morning outside the city. Wen Yuan's lessons didn't end until early afternoon, and - by then - Lan Wangji and the other cultivators would surely be ensconced in Nie Mingjue's meeting room.
Wei Wuxian walked along the road that led to the north for a few minutes, which was in the opposite direction from where the guests would be arriving from. There was a narrow trail that he'd seen while flying over the area. It led to a small meadow, far enough away out of sight from the gates and near no major trail. It had become the place he went to when he wanted to be alone with his thoughts. There was shade and a small stream nearby and some good rocks for lounging on. He could safely spend the rest of the morning there, with no risk of accidentally running into Lan Wangji.
The morning was quickly growing unseasonably warm under the strong late-spring sun. Wei Wuxian had grown up in the heat of Yunmeng, where training was often interspersed with swimming, and the rigid rules of modesty that governed the sects like the Nie and Lan where the climate was cooler and wearing six layers at all times was not a death sentence. Feeling secure in the isolation of the spot he had chosen to train, Wei Wuxian stripped off his outer robes, laying them across a large, flat rock that was on the edge of a small stream. His thin, red inner robe would dry quickly if Wei Wuxian needed to take a rinse in the stream before returning to town.
Wei Wuxian drew Suibian , starting up with a basic warm-up. He wanted to take on a haunting he had heard about nearby with a somewhat stronger spirit than he had tried recently. Before he did, he wanted to really put his body to the test to see how close to full strength he was. He also needed something to do with all of the jittery energy at the knowledge that Lan Wangji was likely already in the Unclean Realm. It had been weeks since he'd seen the man, and the last time he had…
Wei Wuxian felt heat flood through him, equal parts embarrassment and arousal. He shoved them both down and moved his blade faster, pushing harder. He imagined the Xiangliu, how he had struck its scales with all his strength and had his blows simply glance off. He fought it again, in his mind, striking blows against the remembered fissures his lightning attack had left. Wei Wuxian had not been able to finish the creature off, but thankfully, Lan Wangji had .
He imagined what it must have been like, Lan Wangji battling the creature with deadly intensity. He would have had to have examined the remains of Wei Wuxian's attacks, and - as always - had been able to understand Wei Wuxian's intent in battle and followed through without needing any explanation. The graceful strength of precision of Lan Wangji's attacks with Bichen must have been legendary. Wei Wuxian wished he had been conscious enough to have witnessed it first hand.
Wei Wuxian continued to leap and spin, striking out with Suibian with all his physical and spiritual power. His robe clung to his skin, catching a bit on the raw scar on his chest where the arrow had pierced him. Wei Wuxian pulled his arms out of the sleeves, folding the robe down at the waist so he could continue without the risk of aggravating the scar tissue, which he was sure Wen Qing would check later. The sun was warm on his sweat-sheened shoulders and back, and he reveled in the fluid flex and pull of his muscles working at their limit. His strength was almost fully back. Now it was just a matter of testing his stamina.
The soft sound of a leaf being crushed beneath someone's foot caught his attention, and Wei Wuxian spun, blade poised to strike.
It was not an assassin that was standing at the edge of the small clearing.
"Lan Zhan!" Wei Wuxian's voice sounded odd to his own ears as a wave of nine different emotions hit him at once at the sight of his friend after so many weeks apart, leaving him feeling stunned and overwhelmed. "What are you doing here?"
His voice came out constricted, and he could only hope that Lan Wangji ascribed it to surprise, rather than whatever it was that surged fierce and hot through Wei Wuxian's chest at the sight of the man he hadn't seen in almost a month. Lan Wangji was rigid and utterly still as he stood looking at Wei Wuxian. The wind had chosen that moment to pick up, causing Lan Wangji's white silk robes to flow around his body, making him even more ethereal and other-worldly than usual.
He was so beautiful, it took Wei Wuxian's breath away to see him in person again after so long with just his imaginings.
Lan Wangji's expression was frozen, his eyes locked on Wei Wuxian with even more than their usual intensity. His eyes drifted to the scar on Wei Wuxian's chest, and lingered there, likely assessing Wei Wuxian's rate of healing.
"Wei Ying. Wear your robes properly," Lan Wangji scolded after a suspended moment.
Wei Wuxian laughed, shaking his head even though he felt his face flush in a way it hadn't in the past. Lan Wangji never changed, and Wei Wuxian loved him for it. The truthfulness of that thought made Wei Wuxian's breath catch in his throat, and he quickly turned towards the small stream to get his face under control before Lan Wangji noticed something was off. He had always been shameless with Lan Wangji, but it had never been with intent. Not that Wei Wuxian was intending anything at the moment, but the feel of Lan Wangji's piercing gaze, even if it was a disapproving one, landed differently now than it had a month ago.
Wei Wuxian would rather die than admit it, however, so he threw Lan Wangji a smirk over his shoulder as he sheathed Suibian.
"Ah, Lan Zhan! Always so proper." Wei Wuxian turned back and headed towards the stream, hoping his jangling nerves would shut the fuck up before he lost his mind. He knelt down on a dry rock at the edge of the book, and quickly sluiced water over his face and shoulders to rinse the sweat away. The water was freezing, but it did nothing to cool the strange new awareness that was pulsing through Wei Wuxian's body as he felt Lan Wangji's gaze on him.
He didn't have a cloth to dry himself with, he hesitated to pull his red inner robes up over his damp shoulders. He turned to find Lan Wangji standing only a few paces away, still watching Wei Wuxian with no expression.
"Lan Zhan! The stream here isn't quite as cold as the waters of your Cold Spring, but you can join me if you'd like."
"Shameless," Lan Wangji said, turning away sharply.
The familiar response settled some of the odd churning in Wei Wuxian's stomach. Whatever wayward thoughts that Wei Wuxian might be having about Lan Wangji, it was clear that Lan Wangji did not have similar issues. It would be like it always had been, as soon as Wei Wuxian learned to control his own mind: Wei Wuxian would say or do something flirtatious, and Lan Wangji would become annoyed and tell Wei Wuxian off.
Wei Wuxian hadn't ruined it by having... thoughts about Lan Wangji.
"Lan Zhan! Always so stuffy. But you know, you're going to have to learn to deal with this when you marry. Unless you make it really clear how you feel. All those rumors about you agreeing to have a cultivation partner might confuse your spouse."
Lan Wangji began to look back at Wei Wuxian at his words, then immediately snapped his head back in the other direction. His long, slender fingers gripped the hilt of Bichen so hard that the knuckles turned white.
" Dress properly ," Lan Wangji said, his voice harsh.
Wei Wuxian chuckled fondly, but pulled his inner robe up and walked over to the rock where his outer robes were set and began pulling them on. Lan Zhan was so pure and proper. Wei Wuxian actually did worry quite a bit about whether or not his spouse would put pressure on Lan Wangji regarding 'marital duties'. Surely no one could be married to such a man and not want to be touched intimately by him. Wei Wuxian just hoped that - whoever his sect picked as Lan Wangji's spouse - they would be respectful and considerate and not push for things Lan Wangji had no interest in.
"You must be relieved now that at least you won't be forced to seek a cultivation partner. Everyone is saying that the focus is just on political alliances now. Arranged marriages still sound like they'd suck, but at least you are allowed to have your space."
Lan Wangji turned sharply to look at Wei Wuxian, his gaze heavy with a meaning that Wei Wuxian could not decipher..
"I still seek a cultivation partner."
Wei WuXian's brain stuttered. One of the two of them was not understanding the implication of that statement, and he was pretty sure it was Lan Zhan.
"You… want a cultivation partner?"
"Mm," Lan Wangji replied, seemingly quite clear.
"But wait. No. I mean, yeah, you probably want someone to meditate with and like… do night hunts with on the regular because… it's always good to have someone whose skills you know you can trust." Images of Lan Wangji night hunting with Mianmian flickered through his head, and he felt his stomach twist unpleasantly. "I get that. But that's not what having a cultivation partner means ."
Wei Wuxian felt somehow like he was having 'the talk' with one of the younger disciples back at Lotus Pier when they'd asked him about where babies come from.
Lan Wangji gave him a flat look that seemed to imply he was already well aware of what Wei Wuxian was trying to tell him, but that just didn't make any sense. Lan Wangji wasn't even comfortable seeing a male friend's bare torso, much less actually touching someone.
Wei Wuxian suddenly felt a surge of protectiveness. Lan Zhan might be one of the strongest cultivators of their generation, but this was something he clearly was not trained for. The Lans, with all their repression and restraint, might not realize that these sorts of things need to be made clear in the early stages of the marital contract negotiation, or the parties could end up extremely unhappy with the arrangement.
Why was no one looking out for Lan Zhan?!
Wei Wuxian needed to fix this before Lan Wangji committed to something he would regret. Once Lan Wangji gave his word about something, he would keep it no matter what. The thought of Lan Zhan having sex with someone out of a sense of duty or obligation made Wei Wuxian feel almost queasy.
Wei Wuxian had to make him understand so he could avoid putting himself in that situation.
"You couldn't even look at the etchings I gave you back in Cloud Recesses! Lan Zhan, you have to be careful what you say to people, or they'll get the wrong idea and have expectations about the wedding night. Everyone is talking about who will get to marry the great Hanguang-Jun! Poor Lan Qiren must be going blind and deaf from all the proposal offers he has to read and listen to for you. So you will need to be more clear, Lan Zhan. Having a cultivation partner involves sex, Lan Zhan. Fucking . You can't even look at pictures of it!"
Wei Wuxian felt his own face flush and his chest and brain were doing really weird things that he needed someone to help him with immediately.
"Not fucking. Joint spiritual cultivation," Lan Wangji stated primly.
Wei Wuxian gave himself a lot of credit for not throwing himself into the stream at the sound of Lan Wangji actually saying the word 'fucking'.
" Naked spiritual cultivation while fucking !" Wei Wuxian exclaimed, his arms gesturing wildly.
"I have read the books on the process," Lan Wangji replied, way too calmly for the conversation they were currently having, in Wei Wuxian's opinion.
Books. From the Lan library, where all the passion was sucked out of everything. Those books were likely vague and unclear, but Lan Wangji was looking at him steadily while they were taking about sex.
"You don't even like it when people brush against the edge of your outer robes, Lan Zhan!"
Lan Wangji's gaze darkened, and he gave Wei Wuxian an unreadable look.
"I will not mind my cultivation partner touching me."
Wei Wuxian thought he might actually enter qi deviation if this conversation continued. He threw his arm up in the air.
"I give up. Whatever. You want to go do this, then fine. Just… fine ! But don't say I didn't warn you when you get married to someone who wants to touch you all the time. Because that is what is going to happen if you're not clear , Lan Zhan! Anyone who has the chance to marry you will want to touch you all the time, every day. You just… you have no idea!"
Lan Wangji's eyes had widened at Wei Wuxian's tirade. Wei Wuxian mounted Suibian , not even sure why he was so ridiculously angry. All he knew was that if he stayed in the clearing talking about how Lan Wangji was willing to have frequent sex with some random, hypothetical cultivator he was going to lose his mind.
He was already landing in the practice yard of the Unclean Realm when he realized he never actually found out what Lan Wangji had been doing there. He sighed. He would have to find the man before he left. The meetings were scheduled to last well into the evening, so that should not be an issue. But first, Wei Wuxian needed to be able to breathe. And a drink. Wei Wuxian really needed a drink.