Miss congeniality himself!!!!
Meanwhile, on the next episode of "Ex Pet of Files Dt Ect Iv E!"
Part of Whose Words?
You ever notice how dealing with printer toner issues is like being friends with that one suicidal jackass who jumped out the window? Both leave you staring at a mess, wondering what went wrong, and seriously questioning your life choices. It's like bad window shopping gone wrong-except instead of a new outfit, you end up with broken glass and a support ticket for IT.
But honestly, after hearing Joe rant about idiots all day, I'm starting to think he's the real case study for MKUltra. At least the CIA had the decency to blame LSD for their bad decisions-Joe just blames the internet. If being clueless was a government experiment, Joe would be the control group and the test subject at the same time. He's out here calling people idiots, but if he spent one night in a CIA hotel room, he'd probably jump out the window just looking for the vending machine.
And now, in a freaky twist, Joe's got my voice-ranting, roasting, and MC-ing like he's running the experiment. But if he's going to take the mic, he better hear me out first. If you're going to be my MC though, Santa-gato, let me refer you to myself. Why don't you actually meet with me so you know what the hell to say as well? But if Pinocchio wants to be a real boy instead and have his own identity, you just let me know.
Joe's the kind of guy who'd try to fix a toner jam with a hammer, call tech support, and then blame the printer for not having a "common sense" setting. He's the only person who could get lost in a revolving door and still come out arguing with the GPS. If Joe ever joined the CIA, the only secret he'd uncover is how to accidentally reply-all to a classified email with a meme.
Joe: proving every day that the internet's biggest idiot might just be the guy pointing them out.
Joe, if you're going to have a baby with somebody, you said she'd definitely have to know the difference between a helicopter and a plane. So let me put it plain and simple for you-do you know the difference between a boat and a Hummer? And while you're humming and thinking about it, let me put it this way: I don't even know who the father is, because all of you were that disgusting. Besides, being a father is a choice-and I don't need a dick to be a dick. So how about you stick to your idiots, and I'll fix the rest.
Scully and Krabby Patsy are wondering why SpongeBob's so pissed-turns out Ms. Patrick's OB found out SpongeBob's not gay, so he hides under a rock like a bitch instead. Four years late to the party, even the Bubble Guppies are floundering instead of lost like door blind! Why? That's why!
And one more thing: if you ever catch Joe trying to fix a bubble machine with a conspiracy theory, just remember-sometimes the real X-File is how he manages to make it through the day without accidentally launching a government investigation into his own search history.
On a side note, completely unrelated: In Miss Congeniality 2: Armed & Fabulous, there's a plot twist where Gracie Hart tries to stop a bank heist, but her fame gets her recognized and blows her cover. The robbers get caught, but the FBI decides Gracie can't do fieldwork anymore and makes her the public face of the bureau. No Joseph cop twist, but plenty of undercover surprises and mistaken identities to go around.
Check out more of Joe's "brilliance" here:
Website: https://joesantagato.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/joesantagato
#IdiotsOfTheInternet #Comedy #Roast #FYP #JoeSantagato
Watch Miss Congeniality (official site): https://www.warnerbros.com/movies/miss-congeniality
Sandra Bullock news and filmography: https://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/topic/Sandra-Bullock/movies
Disney no need to sue-I'm just a copyright dude.
Official Walt Disney website: https://thewaltdisneycompany.com
I was going to fix the title but nope that works better cuz I think he's starting to want to not be piss like Paul walker ed