In the dead of the night, Lu Yan's eyes snapped open.
For a moment, nothing seemed wrong. The room was dark and quiet.
But Lu Yan didn't dare move. She opened her eyes wide, looking out into the dark without making the slightest movement.
"I know you're awake. I can hear the change in your breathing," a soft voice came from the dark.
Lu Yan's heart jumped. It was a voice she knew too well.
She sat up slowly, and whispered, "What are you doing here at this time of night?"
Han entered the bed, sat on the edge and softly drew the curtains around them.
The darkness became more absolute, but while her eyes couldn't see him, she could smell him.
That familiar scent brought back too many memories.
He lit a flame stick.
Suddenly she could see.
That familiar face, those dark eyes. Her heart was in her throat.
She looked at him, studying every feature hungrily.
Only to realize he was studying her just as closely.
Feeling uncertain, she dropped her eyes, and said nonsensically, "You are aware that anyone outside the curtains will see both our shadows right?"
"I have people keeping watch. I promise no one will find out."
"That's not the point. You shouldn't be here."
"Lu Yan," Han whispered.
She waited for him to continue, but he said nothing else.
She looked up, questioning.
He looked at her pale face, her tired eyes. The turmoil that had stirred in his heart earlier that day in court finally settled.
All the words he had prepared disappeared into nothingness.
Because nothing else was more important, he said gently, "Asan said your wound was torn open again. And this whole room stinks of blood."
His looked down at her robe. On the light color the horrifying almost black stain jumped right out.
The same dark color stained her bedsheets.
He frowned.
Lu Yan followed his gaze, seeming surprised at the size of the stain, "I was too tired earlier, and fell asleep before I could handle it."
"What are your maids for if they can't even handle this little thing?"
"I sent them away earlier."
"You suspect them?"
Reluctantly, Lu Yan answered, "I don't know how Chen Yuan found out."
She didn't mention what Chen Yuan had found out, but the air between them was instantly filled with an unbearable tension.
Lu Yan looked at Han's suddenly cold eyes.
She didn't know why, but at this time of night, with the silence all around, in his presence, her eyes filled up again.
She didn't dare blink, and swallowed convulsively, trying to push everything down.
Even so, two streams started in her eyes, and fell down her cheeks.
Han was suddenly right there cupping her face, thumbing her tears away. More tears fell instantly.
He closed the flame stick, sat back, and pulled her into his arms gently, mindful of her wound.
She put her arms around his neck, suddenly sobbing. She buried her face in his neck, her mouth in his robes, trying to stop the sound.
He held her tightly, rubbing her back, "Don't cry, don't cry. Whatever it is, we can solve it. There's no need to cry."
She continued trembling in his arms.
"Just talk to me Lu Yan, tell me what's wrong. I'll help you. I'll always help you."
Sobbing and hiccuping, Lu Yan held nothing back, "I've always taken contraceptive soup. But I just found out I was pregnant. Chen Yuan found out too quickly. I'm afraid there's a spy around me. He probably knows everything. I'll ruin master's plan. And my wound really really hurts, but I can't take pain relieving medicine. And I really really don't want a child at this time. Chen Hai is so clueless, I can't count on him for anything. Everything has gone so wrong. I don't know how to fix anything. I'm so tired. I'm really tired. And it really hurts."
"Let's look at your wound first," he said, pulling back.
He lit the flame stick again and handed it to her, "Hold this for me."
She took it from him, and held it up, still weeping. With another hand, she lifted her robe, exposing her bandaged stomach.
Han had actually brought a field medicine kit with him.
Without a word, he undid the blood soaked bandages wrapped around her middle. Then he cleaned the wound.
The minutes passed in silence as she held the light and he cleaned carefully.
Lu Yan's tears dried up, giving way to exhaustion.
He produced a cream, "This will numb the area it's applied on. It's not as good as a pain reliever, but it's better than nothing. It should be safe for your-"
He couldn't bring himself to say the word 'child'.
Lu Yan closed her eyes, tired beyond belief, and just nodded.
He applied the cream with deft fingers. She felt a sensation of coolness that covered the pain.
Lu Yan breathed in relief.
He took his time, carefully wrapping the wound back up.
"This is just like the old days, isn't it?" he joked lightly when he was done. "Except I was always the one hurt."
Lu Yan opened her eyes, and stared at him, unamused.
He took the light from her, "Where are your robes? You should get out of this one. It's all wet."
Lu Yan pointed, "There's a blue one hanging there."
He opened the curtains, and went out. Lu Yan watched his shadow dance on the walls of her room.
He handed it to her and turned around, "Take your time, don't move too fast, and undo all my hard work."
Lu Yan didn't dare ask him to bring her undergarments.
She peeled off her soggy blood-soaked clothes. Slowly, trying not to jostle her wound, she then put on the clean ones, securing both her inner and outer robes tightly.
"I'm done," she called out. Her face was pale from the pain.
He turned and looked her over with dark piercing eyes.
In the light of the flame stick, framed by the darkness, his face was indescribably beautiful.
He looked at her bed coverings, and raised a brow.
Lu Yan shook her head.
Without a word, he helped her move to a section of the bed that wasn't drenched in blood. Arranging her pillows, he settled her down comfortably.
Leaning close to her, he asked seriously, "Do you remember those days? We forged several life-and-death bonds with each other."
Lu Yan found herself nodding under his expectant eyes.
"So no matter what else happens between us, you should remember that we have already forged such a bond. If you need help, you shouldn't hesitate to ask me."
Lu Yan found herself tearful again.
"Xiao Han," she said, aiming for an even tone, hating that her voice sounded so broken, "What happens if helping me becomes a hurdle to your revenge? Will you abandon me again?"