It's been over a month since I have been going to the palace to visit prince callus and each time he would either ignore me or he wouldn't show up. I tried finding out why he acts that way and all i was told is that his mother the emperors 2nd concubine lady Auriel was sick. I dont know how her illness has anything to do with me, the connections i can make is that the count must have done something, which would explain his deep hate.
I don't mind that he hates me though, as I spend the time meant for him learning more about magic. I'm almost done learning the magic in vol 1 which is just the using basic spells. I was even able to clean the dust out of the room with water magic and clean the air using wind magic. The maids who cleaned the library after that were so shocked at how dirty the library got that day.
The count still takes me to his study for his 'education ' he tries to only make it on days i do not have to see pronce callus. As for the countess, she still looks at me like an abomination and Clark, he still goes out of his way to pretend I don't exist. I would say every day has been the same.
The maids still show me so much sympathy for reasons I do not know and Sarah is still the sweetest and warmest thing in my life. I have considered running away but I don't know enough about this world to do something so reckless. Here i have a roof over my head, good food and it's just the occasional education from the count that irks me.
I hope my days will continue like this till adulthood. I don't know how i got to this world or why I'm here. i don't know if there is a divine being out there listening but please let my days not get more complicated than this. Let everyday continue to be just like this. I dont need love, I just want magic.
I know i shouldn't get comfortable in this abuse, I know I should try to rebel, run away even, but I'm scared. I don't know what awaits me out there. I still have no idea how memories of my past life can be of use to me here. It's not like I remember everything perfectly. I remember my name and that I had a family but I know nothing else. I know we had advanced technology but that's about it. I can also remember that novels about reincarnation exist and the main protagonist always use their memories to serve some grand purpose but what exactly is reality and what is fiction? What if it was all a dream? What if this is all a dream? I get scared, I get so scared.
My plan is to continue to learn magic till I come of age. According to my etiquette teacher the engagement party can only be held once I turn 12 and the wedding will be after I come of age at 18.
Learn magic, try to use memories from my supposed past life to my advantage to make money and after marriage at 18 I'll run off to a far away place where no one can hurt me. Till then I'll build my power and try to make money.
It's been 6 years since I started coming to the palace as a playmate and I have only met the prince a total of 6 times. Over the years I was able to learn more about this world and understand the hatred towards my family. In summary the count is a ruthless bastard who doesnt believe that there will be consequences for his actions. According to some of the guards at the palace, it's rumored that the count poisoned the lady auriel and used the antidote as leverage for the engagement. The poison caused long term damage to her which is why the prince shows hostility towards me . Well I wouldn't blame him. I would do the same to me. He is just 2 years older so I wouldn't expect him to understand that just cause the count is rotten it doesn't mean I am too.
Walking down the hallway that leads to the library has become my favorite pass time now. The smell of books, the sound of the secret entrance opening, the stuffy feeling of this secluded space and the evidence of 6 years of Hardwork learning magic plastered all over the walls.
After learning all the basics, barrier magic was what I learnt next. Soundproofing barrier, shock absorption, space manipulation. Now no one would hear or feel a thing. Here is to another good day of learning magic. Unlike what I've read in other magic books, when I use magic I don't feel the formations of magic circle nor do I need to use chants. I dont know how my magic compares to regular magic and i don't care. I just enjoy the feel of mana filling me up and the joy of my magic coming to life.
"My lady the count has asked for you" whats this deja vu the count only sends for me using the aide when it's important. In the last 6 years almost like a spell was cast on him the count has denied my whole existence pretendinglike i no longer exist. He didn't call me In for education. At first I was shocked, then confused after that I just rolled with it.
"Lead the way" smiling sweetly I walk down those dreaded steps down the gloomy hallway and stood in front of a door all too familiar.
"Your lordship, the lady has arrived" the door creaks open. It's been 6 years i last saw your dreadful face 'father'. He looked so old now. The white in his hair/grey is more and he has more wrinkles.
"Prepare yourself for the engagement to the prince"
"Yes father"
"Tsk useless thing, you may leave" his usual voice that made me tremble, his hateful gaze, his biting words felt familiar yet strange. The once stiffling feeling of fear i felt melts away as indiffernce settles in. Just like a cold winter breeze.
"My lady are you alright? What did the count say" I could see the shock on her face it has been 6 years and I only spent 5 minutes in the study. The maids all sighed for relief as they didn't need to drag my injured self out today.
"The engagement date has been fixed"
"My lady, are you really going to go forward with the engagement?"
I understood Sarah's concern. The prince absolutely hated me. She doesn't know of my plan so I can understand her anxiety
"It's fine anywhere in salum empire would be better than this hellhole" Sarah giggles as she trails behind me.
The next few days were a hectic blurry, etiquette classes, engagement preparation, dresses,more classes.
"If this doesn't kill me I don't know what will"
"My lady, don't say such ominous things" Sarah continues to massage my legs like some radish in preparation for a meal.
"The engagement is tomorrow how do you feel my lady, it's so sad it isn't your regular romantic moment but maybe the prince would warm up to you after it"
Sorry my seeet Sarah not everyone is an angel that decended from the heavens like you. The prince will never see me as anything other than a despicable Dumont.
"Sarah id like to go to bed on time today, I'll see you tomorrow " I wave her off as I crawl into bed. Tomorrow will be another hectic day.
It was a small event, he was a prince but he wasn't the crown prince. With nly the dumont family, the officials, the prince and his friends Aiden Ross heir of Marquess Ross, Charlie Brent the son of a renowned family of knights and Micheal Sirius the 3rd son of count Sirius present for the ceremony.
Standing face to face with prince callus I could feel the rage still In his eyes. His mother couldn't make it which means she is still too sick or she doesn't approve.
I just need to go through this ceremony and fall back to my routine. Being engaged wouldn't change a thing about my life.
Signing the engagement documents is the last step and we are done.
Sitting in a room with prince callus after the ceremony. He hasn't spared me a glance since we got here. His eyes have been glued out of the window. Drinking my tea carefully as I try not to sour the mood any further.
"Do you know why I hate you" his blue eyes pierced into my soul as if trying to rip it apart.
"That shameless side of you dumonts, you feel the whole world can burn as long as you gain power and wealth." Well that sounds exactly like the count. I continue to drink uttering no words. His face grows even more angry.
" even after all you did to ruin my life, you sit there shamelessly drinking tea without a care in the world. How does it feel to be engaged to a man that will never love you. To a man that will despise you for the rest of time. " His icy gaze now burning with so much hate.
"You must have thought you finally won. A mere count made a member of the imperial household bow his head" he spits out every word sharpened to cut deeper than the last.
Standing up so fast his chair falls over. He storms out of the room.
'Well i guess if I'm destined to be hated by all in this world I might as well be a little greedy and shameless' the divine in the world wouldn't be too angry as this was a life I never asked for.